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1、嘿你在这呢Hey,thereyouare.我想你了-我也想你了Imissyou.-1missyou,too.你在哪呢Whereareyou?我在我新的市议会办公室minmynewcitycounciloffice.不是吧-我知道啊你喜欢吗Noway.-1know,doyoulikeit?我爱死了1loveit.我也爱来看看Iloveit,too.Checkthisout.这是我的鼓舞♥女♥性之墙Hereismywallofinspirationalwomen.啊Ah.那是你自己的照片吗Isthatapictureofyou?是的我还是乐意承认我经常被自己鼓舞Yes.
2、IambigenoughtoadmitthatIamofteninspiredbymyself.这是我的钟Pawnee和华盛顿Herearemyclocks.PawneeandWashingtonD.C.同一个时区Sametimezone.哦这是史上最酷的部分了Oh,thisisthecoolestpartever.我有自己的私人卫生间Ihavemyownprivatebathroom.里面有人Occupied!哦我的天-恶OhmyGod.-Ugh.Jamm议员CouncilmanJamm.你在我的卫生间干嘛呢Whatareyoudoinginmybathroom?我不知道我是不是该叫你的卫生
3、间1dontknowifiwouldcallityourbathroom.它唯一的门在我办公室里面啊Itsonlydoorisinmyoffice.我觉得太离谱了资历最浅的市议员Ithinkitiscrazythatthemostjuniorcitycouncilor有了个自己的私人卫生间就是因为她是个女孩子getsaprivatebathroomjustbecausesheisagirl.你说什么呢-我们来解决问题Excuseme?-Letssolvethis.告诉你我要怎么做Tellyouwhatmgoingtodo.我要在这卸液体货mgoingtodropmyliquidsinhere,
4、固体还是去大厅takemysolidsdownthehall.成交吗不不成交Deal?-No.Nodeal.行你的损失Fine.Yourloss.怎么损失啊How?公园与游憩公园与游憩第5季第3集第5季第3集关于我的有趣事实Funfactaboutme.我最近开始了密集的心理治疗Irecentlybeganintensivepsychotherapy.我可能已经跟你们提起过了Imayhavementionedthattoyoualready.很多次Severaltimes.嗯就就像我的咨♥询♥师说的Well,likemytherapistsays,“分享怎么都不算多
5、不算频繁”Youcantsharetoomuchortoooften.你知道Gayle和我我们去做过一阵子夫妻咨♥询♥Youknow,GayleandLwesawacouplestherapistforalittlewhile.那就是太多了JerryThatstoomuch,Jerry.真的你俩床上的事情别拿出来说Forreal.Keepusoutyourbedroom.曾经是这样的我心情不好的时候我打给我母亲Itusedtobe,when1wasdown,Icalledmymother.我缺乏自信心的时候我打给我的跑步教练WhenIlackedself-confi
6、dence,Icalledmyrunningcoach.而现在不管我感受到什么情绪Andnow,nomatterwhatemotionmfeeling,我只打一个电♥话♥-我的咨♥询♥师Icallonenumber-mytherapist.我想对这个城市做同样的事Iwanttodothesamethingforthecity.一个给城市的心理咨♥询&hearts刃币Apsychotherapistforthecity.不AndyNo,Andy.不是吧-一条311热♥线♥No.-A311line.市
7、民不管有什么问题都拨♥ff♥311热♥线♥Citizenswillcall311forwhateverproblemtheyhave.没清理的垃圾坏掉的路灯Uncollectedgarbage,brokenstreetlight,而我们会把他们指引向合适的部门andwewilldirectthemtotheproperdepartment.Chris好主意啊Chris,greatidea.谢谢你Andy我也同意Thankyou,Andy.Iagree.我爱这个主意Ilovethisidea.我也爱我想到这个主意AndIlovemefort
8、hinkingofit我的咨♥询♥师说我需要对自己多做口头赞扬MytherapistsaidthatIneedtobemorevocalaboutappreciatingmyself.谢谢你ChrisThankyou,Chris.不用谢ChrisYourewelcome,Chris.我听起来好疯Isoundinsane.我要去和咨♥询♥师聊聊mgoingtogotalktomytherapist.欢迎收看今日PawneeWelcometoPawneeToday.我是一流的女主持人JoanCallamezzoIamfirst-ratenew
9、swoman)oanCallamezzo.主持人今日Pawnee)投票市政厅做得好吗？是的不是未决定Pawnee市议会的支持率在一个凄惨的3%Pawnee,sCityCouncilapprovalrateisatadismal3%.那可是史上最低恶心Thatsanall-timelow.Yuck.1.eslie市议会过去几年里做到的事情非常之少1.eslie,thecitycouncilhasdoneverylittleoverthepastfewyears,而即使他们做到的事情andwhattheyhaveaccomplished,在我看来也很尴尬inmyopinion,hasbeenemb
10、arrassing.而那可是事实Andthatisafact.不那是你的观点No,thatsyouropinion.1.eslieKnope羞愧的市.女议员那就是观点的定义Thatsthedefinitionofanopinion.嗯那可是你的观点Well,that,syouropinion.市议会确实有一些政♥治♥僵局和党派争端Thecitycouncilhassomepoliticalgridlockandsomepartisanbickering,但我们实际上即将通过一条议案-butwe,reactuallyabouttopassabill我的议案-mybil
11、l-,(LeslieKnope太阳下的乐趣”法案theLeslieKnopeFunInTheSunAct,提议在全镇范围延长公共游泳池开放时间whichwillextendpublicpoolhourscitywide.可以说是挺“大不了”的事吗Canyousay,bigwhoop?最近Pawnee海豚游泳队的队长Recently,theCaptainofthePawneePorpoisesswimteam问我能不能让公共游泳池开放久一点askedmeifwecouldkeepthepublicpoolsopenlonger这样他们可以多有一点练习时间sotheycouldlogmorepra
12、cticetime,而我说“当然可以“andIsaid,Absolutely.1因为我不仅仅是个市议员BecausenotonlyamIacitycouncilor.我还是个游泳”有谋的市议员macitycouncilorwithporpoise.经由通过这项法案和延长泳池开放时间Bypassingthebill,andextendingpoolhours,我们是在和市民们说这届市议会wearesayingtoourcitizensthatthisCityCouncil致力于让这个镇更好isdeterminedtobetterourtown.好的Pawnee海豚少年游泳队Okay,Pawnee
13、Porpoisesyouthswimteam,我有个问题要问你们Ihaveaquestionforyou.你们最大的成就是什么Whatisyourgreatestaccomplishment?我们去年在郡游泳比赛得到第四名WecameinfourthintheCountyswimmeetlastyear.错误你们最大的成就Wrong,yourgreatestaccomplishment是两小时后这项法案变成法规的时候ishappeningintwohourswhenthisbillbecomeslaw.耶Yay.我只想让你们为自己非常自豪Ijustwantyoutobeveryproudofy
14、ourselves,因为这项法案会开始一段城市.和其政♥府♥的漫长浪漫史becausethisbillisgoingtostartalongromancebetweenthecityanditsgovernment.海豚叫声Porpoisecall!你在干什么啊Whatareyoudoing?我在模仿海豚叫声这是我还是你们队伍一员时经常做的mdoingaporpoisecall,whichweusedtodowhenIwaspartofyourgroup,但看起来你们已经不再这么做了butitseemslikeyoudontdoitanymore那也没事我不是怪人a
15、ndthatsfine.mnotweird.好啦所有人离开吧Okay,everybodyleave.我们市议会会议再见llseeyouatthecitycouncilmeeting.嘿你忙吗Hey,areyoubusy?写星际迷航同人小说不算AndwritingStarTrekfanfictiondoesnotcount.哈哈哈Hahaha.我上周就写完了怎么了I.finisheditlastweek.Whatsgoingon?嗯我想Andy了Um,ImissAndy.你可能也想你的爱人ChriS了Andyouprobablymissyourlover,Chris.是Leslie1.eslie
16、.我有个主意今天周五Ihadanidea.ItsFriday.Pawnee开车去只要十个小时公路旅行吗Pawnee,sonlyaten-hourdrive.Roadtrip?哦我不知道啊我周末准备试着提前开始一些工作的Oh,Idontknow,Iwasgoingtotrytogetajumponsomeworkthisweekend.大哥30年后的今天Dude,30yearsfromnow,您在临终的那一刻你会记得什么呢whenyoureonyourdeathbed,whatareyougoingtoremember?整理文件还是一次给LeSIie惊喜的随意的公路旅行Organizingfil
17、esortakingaspontaneousroadtriptosurpriseLeslie?是啊你知道吗行我参加Yeah,youknowwhat?Allright.Imin.你知道我们可能可以早点溜走Youknow,wemightbeabletosneakoutearly.你去买♥♥零食我搞定音乐Yougetsnacks.I1bringmusic.我们来点小曲儿上路We,lljamouttosomesweettunage.你知道吗这也太棒了Youknowwhat?Thisisawesome.实际上算了我不想去了Actually,no.Idon,twanttogoa
18、nymore.哦好吧Oh.Okay.开玩笑的十分钟后见Justkidding.Seeyouintenminutes.好吧Okay.开玩笑的我们不去了Justkidding.We,renotgoing.公路旅行哦Roadtrip!所以我们要去吗Soweregoing?是的啊Yes!哦我能和April相处一一下挺激动的Oh,mexcitedtobondalittlewithApril.她就像是我从未有过的小妹妹SheslikethelittlesisterIneverhad.因为我有的那个小妹妹BecausethelittlesisterIdohave很正常也不可怕isnormalandnotte
19、rrifying.“我要杀了你”311-嗯Diane处理坑洞的话311.-Well,Diane,forpotholes,你应该去找公共工程部youwanttospeakwithPublicWorks.我理解你已经试着联♥系&hearts他们四次了Iunderstandyouvetriedthemfourtimes.政♥府♥很低效而且应该解散Governmentisinefficientandshouldbedissolved.请不要挂机我帮你转接PleaseholdwhileItransferyou.Donna你能帮帮我吗Donna,canyouhel
20、pme?我接到个311电♥话♥但都是静电Igota311call,butitwasallstatic.那听起来像是个IT问题ThatsoundslikeanI.T.problem.嗯那我要怎公联♥系♥IT部门呢Well,howdoIgetI.T.here?打311啊Call311.311我能怎311,howcanI-哦又是你啊DianeOh,helloagain,Diane.没人接听吗Nobodyanswered?好的你猜怎么着Okay,youknowwhat?有人会马上到的Someonewillbethereshortly.Andrew
21、带上你的午饭一些水Andrew,getyourlunch,somewater,和一包18公斤的沥青anda40-poundbagofasphalt.好的老板我们要去哪Okay,boss.Whatarewedoing?我们要去填个坑嘿Werefixingapothole.-Hey!Pawnee311我能怎么帮-Pawnee311.HowcanIhelp-哦不不这不是911报♥警♥电♥话♥Oh,no.No,thisisnot911.不不这是311No,no.Thisis311.Donna他们把我的热♥线♥切换到了9
22、11Donna,theyswitchedmyphonewith911.我要怎么做啊Whatdo1do?我也不知道啊试着帮忙吧Idontknow.Trytohelp.现在安静Nowhush.五十度灰这边情节正热火朝天呢Itisheatingupinthispiece.哦那听起来太糟糕了Oh,thatsoundsawful.我的天啊也太热了Goodlord,itishot.是啊饶了我吧Yes,mercyme.住在这个镇上就像是住在恶魔的屁♥股♥沟里Livinginthistownslikelivinginthedevilsbuttcrack.几平没油了Almostout
23、ofgas.我等到我们上高速再说Illwaittillwereonthehighway.嗯GPS说我们要走495转270Now,theGPSsaysweshouldtake495to270,但看看这条我找到的超酷替代路-butcheckoutthiscoolalternaterouteIfou-哦我的天这对我也太有意思了Oh,myGod,thatissointerestingtome因为我是个地图销♥售♥员becausemamapsalesman.我们为啥还不动啊Whyarentwemoving?因为其他车啊Because.Othercars.你能不那么做吗求你别W
24、illyounotdothat?Pleasedon,t.你就是该这么-Thatswhatyoudowhenyou-请不要-哦好啊来了个人Pleasedontdo-Oh,great,herecomesaguy.打扰一下-嗯哼Excuseme.-Mm-hmm?我们为啥没动啊出口暂时关闭Whyarentwemoving?-Exitsclosedforabit.总统车队Presidentialmotorcade.我先熄火等着出口再开吧1Ijustshutoffthecartillitopensup.我了个神啊也太热了HolyBleep,itshot.哦耶耶Oh,yeah,yeah.很美Tom太美了Be
25、autiful,Tom.Beautiful.极好的牙龈-哦谢rDynamitegums.-Aw,thanks.Tom你想知道为什么我搬来Pawnee吗Tom,doyouwanttoknowwhyImovedtoPawnee?当然Sure.因为这里的两大主要产业是玉米糖浆和橡胶奶头Itsbecausethetwoleadingindustriesherearecornsyrupandrubbernipples.牙医头奖很天才对吧Itisadentistryjackpot.Itsgenius,right?嗯牙医博士缩写DDS可不是代表“呆呆傻”啊Well,D.D.S.doesntstandford
26、umb,dumb,stupid.我喜欢这个说法Ilikethat.我要偷走了现在是我的了mgoingtostealit.Thatsminenow.好吧酷哦Allright.Cool.Jamm议员和我关系挺紧密的CouncilmanJammandIhavegottenprettytight.而我希望能把这作为筹码赌赢一张Pawnee烟室的会员门票AndmhopingtoparlaythisintoamembershipatthePawneeSmokehouse,那是Pawnee最排他的雪茄俱乐部Pawneesmostexclusivecigarclub.装填过度的皮椅酒柜顶层的白兰地Overst
27、uffedleatherchairs,top-shelfbrandies.陈旧的烟叶恶臭仿佛在说Andthatstaletobaccostenchthatsays,”欢迎来到上流社会”Welcometothetop.你是Pawnee烟室的成员之一对吧YoureamemberofthePawneeSmokehouse,right?哦是的哥们我爱一根好的雪茄Oh,yeah.-Man,Iloveagoodstogie.我实际上刚刚搞了个定制的雪茄剪Iactuallyjusthadthispersonalizedcigarcuttermade.哇Whoa.真的很棒Realnice.不是我的首字母但非常
28、感谢Notmyinitials,butthankyousomuch.哦嗯这不是-0h,well,itsnot-好吧Okay.嘿所以呃Leslie的法案我们还是没问题对吧Hey,so,uh,we,restillallgoodonLesliesbill,right?实际上TOmmy我们得聊聊Actually,Tommy,weneedtotalk.我从中学开始就想烫这个头发了Ihavewantedthispermsincemiddleschool.我简直是激动到极点了Icouldnotbemoreexcitedaboutthis.你激动吗Autumn-激动肯定的Areyouexcited,Autum
29、n?-Yeah,definitely.你给别人烫发之后他们有后悔过的吗Doyouevergiveapermtosomeoneandeverregretit?呃Uh.Ann告诉过我很多次别烫头发了Annhastoldmerepeatedlynottogetaperm.但Ann不在这儿ButAnnsnothere.所以山中无Ann时猴子烫头发SowhentheAnnsaway,themicegetperms.Jamm议员改变了他的投票CouncilmanJammchangedhisvote.他给“太阳下的乐趣”投否决票了He,svotingnoonFunintheSun.什么为啥他向我保证了的啊W
30、hat?Why?Hepromisedme.他只是说他改变主意了Hejustsaidthathechangedhismind.然后他告诉我贴面齿能让我的笑容更亮眼Thenhetoldmesomeveneerscouldreallymakemysmilepop.你觉得呢Thoughts?哦我的天投票还有一个小时了Oh,myGod.Thevoteisinanhour.好的我们需要来一次紧急战略会议Okay,Weneedtohaveanemergencystrategysessionnow.那烫发呢-烫发必须等着了AutumnWhatabouttheperm?-Thepermmustwait,Autu
31、mn!烫发必须等着Thepermmustwait.等等所以这意味着法案不会通过了吗Wait.Sothismeansthebillisntgoingtopass?我的父母说你们什么都做不成Myparentssaidthatyouguyscantgetanythingdone.现在等等好吧等下Now,wait,okay,holdon.长♥期♥来讲这还没结束Thisisntoverbyalongshot.但现在是三比二反对我们Butit,sthreetotwoagainstus.是啊我知道数学怎么做MasonYeah,Iknowhowtodomath,Mason.好吧别大
32、惊小怪Okay,don,tbeanalarmist.我们保持积极心态很重要It,sveryimportantthatwestaypositive.我们的积极心态是最有利的条件Ourpositiveattitudeisourgreatestasset.TOm借一步说话-嗯哼Tom,aword,please.-Mm-hmm.法案死掉了海豚要灭绝了Thebillisdead,thePorpoisesaredoomed,民♥主♥要完蛋了哦我的天啊anddemocracyisover.Oh,myGod.不敢相信我居然决定烫发IcantbelieveIdecidedtogeta
33、perm.Ann不应该让我这么做的Annshouldhaveneverletmedothis.你看Jamm看到你上今日Pawnee)了Look,JammsawyouonPawneeToday.他知道你多想要这个Heknowshowmuchyouwantthis.他只是想要捞点好处Hesjusttryingtogetsomethinginreturn.这是个讨价还价的手段而已Thisisabargainingtool.你知道这就是人们讨厌这个政♥府♥的原因Youknow,thisiswhypeoplehatethegovernment.因为就当我们准备做一点儿真正的好
34、事情时Causejustwhenwereabouttodosomethingreallygood,就因为一些愚蠢自私的混♥蛋♥屁人垮掉了itallfallsapartduetosomestupid,selfishjerkbutt.你知道去他的Jamm去他的JammYouknow,screwJamm.ScrewJamm.我就去试试拿到Milton议员的票吧mjustgoingtotrytogetCouncilmanMilton,svote.Milton他得有150岁了吧Milton?Hes,like,150yearsold.是啊他有孙子孙女的好吧Yeah.Hesgot
35、grandkids,okay?而-而孩子们都爱游泳Andandkidslovetoswim.他会给我们投这票的Andhellgiveushisvote.他是个老人Hesanoldperson,而我会跟他很慢地讲andlltalktohimreallyslowly.他甚至都不知道自己在干什么的Hewontevenknowwhathesdoing.我只需要搞快点我看起来怎么样Ijustneedtohurryup.HowdoIlook?我不知道该怎么回答Idontknowhowtoanswerthat.嗨我是Andy我真喜欢你的裙子Hi,ImAndy.Ireallylikeyourdress.我是个
36、公主-我是个美人鱼maprincess.-mamermaid.我是公园与娱乐部门的主任mthedirectorofParksandRecreation.我是来修补那个坑的mheretofixthathole.这是我们的王国你必须请求允许Thisisourkingdom.Youhavetoaskpermission.什么玩意儿Excuseme?殿下们Yourhighnesses,我们谦卑地请求您们的允许wedohumblyrequestthinepermission来填之洞那边tobefixdothholesyonder.除非你们抓住我们Onlyifyoucantagus.来吧Comehere.
37、你们的税款正在工作呢Yourtaxdollarsatwork.低俗小说原声带SoundtracktoPulpFiction,单身一族原声带soundtracktoSingles,这个杀手将有难原声带soundtracktoGrossePointeBlank.你为啥有这么多原声带啊Whydoyouhavesomanysoundtracks?哦嗯呃Oh,well,uh,我有点把它们当做Ikindoflookatitlike是你最喜欢的导演itsyourfavoritedirectors只给你做了一盘混音带makingamixtapejustforyou.恶Eww.哦这里有盘Oh,here,ssom
38、ething.Benji的清爽时光夏日即兴混音”BenjisCoolTimesSummerJamzMix.*哦不我-你可能不会想听那个.Oh,no,Iyouprobablydontwanttolistentothat.是的我想听就因为-不听那一Yes,Iwanttolistentoit.-Just,cause-no,listen,it-我想听那个-我们不-我们不-Iwanttolistentoit.-Wedont-wedon,t-我想听上面放的是什么我们不需要一Iwannahearwhat,sonit.-Wedon,tneedtoApril.April.Salt-N-Pepa-Shoop咻Sh
39、oop唔你咋样啊Ooh,howyoudoin?我来了我来了看我又来了HereIgo,hereIgo,hereIgoagain妹子们我的弱点是啥男人girls,what,smyweakness?Men!真假Really?别评判我Dontjudgeme.议员我想跟你聊聊“太阳下的乐趣”法案Councilman,dliketotalktoyouabouttheFunInTheSunbill,而我不想催你但投票就在一个小时之后了andIdontmeantorushyou,butthevoteisinanhour.我吃完之后我们再聊Whenmdoneeating,welltalk.我吃同样的午饭已经58
40、年了Iveeatenthesamelunchfor58years.凯撒沙拉多加沙拉酱Caesarsalad,extradressing,多加面包块多加凤尾鱼extracroutons,andextraanchovies.嗯Mmm.Milton议员第一次当选市议员CouncilmanMiltonwasfirstelectedasacitycouncilor是1948年作为南部民♥主♥党人的议员in1948,asamemberoftheDixiecratParty.他们的政纲吗”去取消棒球种族隔离化”Theirplatform?De-integrateBaseball.
41、*秘密成分就是沙拉酱Thesecretisinthedressing.投给Milton“滚出去吧”南部民♥主♥党1948试试看这是种春♥药♥Tryit.Itsanaphrodisiac.你也来点我奇怪的外国朋友Youtoo,mystrange,foreignfriend.不谢了-Tom吃点No,thankyou.-Tom,eatsome.我不会吃种族歧视沙拉的mnoteatingracistsalad.我们吃得越多聊得越快Themoreweeat,thefasterwetalk.嗯Mmm.你真的能尝出愚昧的味道Youcanreallyta
42、stetheignorance.那个读作“凤尾鱼”Itspronouncedanchovies.嗨Hi.DianeLewisDianeLewis.这个坑是我的Iownthispothole.RonSwanson我是来修的RonSwanson.mheretofixit.哦被海草窒息了呃Oh,seaweedchoke!Ugh!那个大男孩是我的同事Thatlargeboyismycolleague.我们在公园部工作WeworkattheParksDepartment.哦你甚至都不是公共工程部的吗Oh,yourenotevenfromthePublicWorksDepartment?看起来没有正规渠道
43、的人1.ook,itappearedthatnoonefromtheproperchannels可以修好这个了所以我决定自己来wasgonnafixthis,soIdecidedtodoitmyself.你知道自己在干什么吗Doyouknowwhatyouredoing?我知道女士Yes,maam.是的我知道Yes,Ido.议员你有孙子孙女了一Councilman,youhavegrandchildren-还有七个重孙重孙女Andsevengreat-grandkids.TimMaryJackTim,Mary,Jack,呃TimMarieTim和Maryuh,Tim,Marie,Tim,and
44、Mary.别忘了TimDontforgetaboutTim.对TimRight,Tim.那是多少个了Howmanyisthat?你知道吗真的很难分辨Youknow,it,sveryhardtotell.可能搞不定了Thismightnotwork.让我去找Jamm看他能不能谈判1.etmefindJamm,seeifhellbargain.嗯哼Mm-hmm.他是哪个国家的Whatcountryishefrom?冰岛Iceland.这段是星际迷航同人小说Data从没有过那种感觉Datahadneverfeltthiswaybefore.”当然Data从未有过任何的感觉Ofcourse,Datah
45、adneverfeltanythingbefore.但Picard船长忍♥不住注意到ButCaptainPicardcouldnthelpbutnote”他机械但栩栩如生的脸上渐渐出现的微笑”thesmilethatcreptoverhismechanicalbutlifelikeface.我要杀了你mgonnamurderyou.我理解但稍等一下1understand,)ustonesecond.”当他们穿过大厅走上舰桥Astheywalkeddownthehallintothebridge来点柠檬水吗1.emonade?拜托谢谢Pleaseandthankyou.嘿很抱歉我早些时候的失礼Hey,msorryifIwascurtearlier.
