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1、哦好啊你们都在呢Oh,goody,youreallhere.嗯我知道我不该在办公室聊我的竞选Now,Iknowmnotsupposedtotalkaboutmycampaignintheoffice,但昨晚我决定了谁该当我的竞选经理butlastnightvemadeadecisionaboutwhoshouldbemycampaignmanager.这是项重大的工作Thisisahugejob.会要求在很多个深夜里Thisisgoingtorequirealotoflatenight,和我一对一即兴one-on-onejamsessionswithme,我们会互相尝试各种点子andwereg
2、onnabounceideasoffofeachother,你必须帮我接电♥话♥youregonnahavetotakecallsforme,任何时候日夜不分anytime,dayornight.我选择的人选是鼓点声起ThepersonIhavechosenis,drumrollplease,AnnPerkins耶为Ann鼓掌吧AnnPerkins!Yay!GiveitupforAnn!选得好Goodchoice.1.eslie我根本对政♥治♥竞选一无所知1.eslie,Idon,tknowthefirstthingaboutrunnin
3、gapoliticalcampaign.Ann你这美丽的热带鱼Ann,youbeautifultropicalfish.你聪明绝顶又能顺应压力Youresmartasawhipandyourecoolunderpressure.你曾经亲手将人的心脏复苏Youveresuscitatedahumanheartinyourbarehands.不我没做过No,Ihaven,t.你没做过吗没Youhaven,t?-No!你会的你就是那么好的护士Youwill.Yourethatgoodofanurse.那Ben呢WhataboutBen?我觉得他is岁竞选市长还赢r呢Imean,heranformay
4、orat18andwon.Ben是我竞选的毒药Benispoisonofmycampaign.我们的关系就是我的顾问们退出的原因Ourrelationshipisthereasonwhymyadvisorspulledout.我AnnI-Ann,别听你的脑袋和你的心dontlistentoyourheadoryourheart.只用看着我的眼睛然后说“好的”Justlookatmyeyesandsayyes.嗯好的-好的Okay,yes.-Yes!我相信你Ann-谢谢Ibelieveinyou,Ann.-Thankyou.而你作为竞选经理的第一份工作就是穿得像一点Andyourfirstjob
5、asmycampaignmanageristostartdressinglikeone.我不想再说一次了1dontwanttohavethisconversationagain.再吗你八秒钟之前才刚刚雇佣我啊Again?Youjusthiredmeeightsecondsago.哇你做得可太差了Wow.Youredoingareallybadjob.公园与游憩公园与游憩第4季第11集第4季第11集William,Elizabeth,-Leslie嗨William,Elizabeth.-Leslie,hi.嗨你们在-你们是来见我的吗Hi.Whatareyou-Areyoucomingtoseem
6、e?你们听说我重新开始竞选了吗Didyouhearthatmrelaunchingmycampaign?实际上没有抱歉Actually,no,sorry.我们不是来见你的我们是来见Wewerentheretoseeyou.Wevebeenmeetingwith其他市议会的潜在候选人otherpotentialcandidatesforcitycouncil.真的吗所以我的竞选结束了Ohreally?Somycampaignends然后你们就像这样找其他人搞他们的竞选吗andjustlikethat,youfindsomeoneelseandruntheirs?是的这是我们的工作Yes,that
7、,sourjob.我知道祝你们好运了Iknow.Goodluck,但呃我刚刚和我的新顾问团开了个大会but,uh,1justhadabigmeetingwithmynewadvisoryboard,而他们都聪明而且绝顶andtheyrebrilliantandamazing.他们真的会很棘手Theyrerealkillers.1.eslie我试着在这个咖啡壶里泡面把所有东西都搞坏了1.eslie,ItriedtomakerameninthecoffeepotandIbrokeeverything.谢谢Andy我马上到Thankyou,Andy.llberightin.嗯呃祝你好运LeSIie真
8、心的Well,uh,goodluck,Leslie.Honestly.嗯我们不需要好运我们可是火箭Well,wedontneedluck.Wearearocketship.我们重新发射了我们会飞过你们的大-哈他们走了Wearerelaunching,andwe,regoingtoblastpastyourcann-Huh,theyregone.是的我已经没有了训练有素的专业竞选经理那又怎样Itstrue-1nolongerhavehighly-trained,professionalcampaignmanagers.Sowhat?谋杀大多数都是训练有素的专业刺客犯下的吗不是啊Aremostmu
9、rderscommittedbyhighly-trained,professionalassassins?No.他们是朋友和同事们犯下的Theyrecommittedbyfriendsandcoworkers.那个比喻在我脑袋里好太多了Thatanalogywaswaybetterinmyhead.嗨-冠军Hi.-Champion?哦我的天你在这儿呢小狗狗Ohmygosh,thereyouare,puppy.真是个好孩子啊那是条三条腿的狗Thatsagoodboy.-Thatisathree-leggeddog.他的名字叫冠军因为他是世界狗冠军HisnameisChampion,because
10、hesthedogworldchampion.好吧我必须得问抱歉Okay,Ihavetoaskthis,msorry,但你们找到他的时候他有多少条腿来着buthowmanylegsdidthatdoghavewhenyoufoundhim?三条啊所以他才是最好的狗Three!Thatswhatmakeshimthebest他用三条腿能做到的比大多数狗用四条腿更多Hecandomorewiththreelegsthanmostdogscandowithfour.除了挖坑他真的不擅长挖坑Exceptfordigging.Hesreallybadatdigging.你记得你说过在这个房&hearts
11、;子里做决定的事吗Andyourememberwhatyousaidaboutmakingdecisionsinthehouse?你想参与进来我们理解所以Youwanttobeinvolved.Wegetthat,so.你一句话Youjustsaytheword,冠军就回到收留所andChampiongoesbacktothepound,他在那里会被永远杀掉wherehecanbeputdownandkilledforever.我不会把一只三条腿的狗送去死的mnotgonnasendathree-leggeddogtohisdeath.好读Yes!但我也不会替你们照顾他的Butmalsonot
12、gonnatakecareofhimforyou.嗯你要是帮点忙会很好的Well,itwouldbeniceifyouhelpedalittle.因为不像你Andy和我还有工作Because,unlikeyou,AndyandIhavejobs.残忍♥但也没错Cruel,butfair.所以LeSHe和我想出了再次竞选集♥会♥的主题SoLeslieand1havecomeupwiththethemeforthecampaignrelaunchrally.“东山再起”TheComebackKid.人人都喜欢东山再起的故事比如洛奇Everyoneloves
13、agoodcomebackstory.Rocky.1999-2002年因吸毒入狱RobertDowneyJr.RobertDowneyJr.终结者说我会回来的”然后回来了Terminatorsaid,llbeback,andhewas.返场的还有-休闲夏威夷衬衫Alsomakingacomeback-thecasualHawaiianshirt.嘿嘿嘿看看是谁走在时尚前沿了Well,well,well,lookwhosaheadofthecurve.我开玩笑的Iwasjoking.你应该把它泡在漂白剂里烧掉Youshouldsoakthatinbleachandburnit.好吧所以集&hea
14、rts;会♥明天在Pawnee体育大楼举♥行♥Okay,so,therallysgoingtobeheldtomorrowatthePawneeSportsBuilding.APriI你办完场地租借手续了对吧April,youfinalizedarental,right?闭嘴Ann我跟你说过永远别跟我说话的Shutup,Ann.Itoldyounevertotalktome.那是冠军说的ThatwasChampion.哦我的天我很抱歉坏狗狗Oh,myGod,msorry.Baddog!是的租借的事情一切顺利Yes,everythingsfinewith
15、therental.Ron你在建台子吗Ron,youreconstructingthestage?是的女士Yes,maam.1.eslie想雇个合同工建台子1.esliewantedtohireacontractortobuildastage.我不想扫射所有人Idontwanttopaintwithabroadbrushhere,但世上每一个合同工buteverysinglecontractorintheworld都是卑鄙的没有能力的小偷isamiserable,incompetentthief.有人说了“披萨饺“吗用叉子打褶封上边-哦妈的Sealtheedgesbycrimpingthefo
16、rk-aw,crap.BenBen!怎么了ChriS进来吧Whatsup,Chris?Comeonin,man.我已经进来了Ialreadydid.所以呃你怎么样最近如何你好吗So,uh,howyoubeen?Howareyoudoing?Howareyou?很好啊实际上我只是在学习怎么做“披萨啊饺Great,actually.mjustlearninghowtomakeacali-zoin-za.或者像你们美国人说的披萨饺Or,asyouAmericansliketosay,calzones.你要来一个吗不了我觉得“披咋饺”太油了而且没有必要Doyouwantone?-No,Ifindcal
17、zonefatty，andunnecessary.我知道你正在度过难关而我关心你So,youvehitabitofaroughpatch,andIcareaboutyou,所以我只想保证你过得还好soIjustwanttomakesureyou,redoingokay.ChriS实话说我很好啊Chris,honestly,mgreat.我只是在探索任何脑内跳出的有趣活动mjustexploringwhateverfunactivitypopsintomybrain.比如看看这个1.ike,checkthisout.我在教自己如何做黏土动画mteachingmyselfhowtodoClayma
18、tionvideos.这不是很酷吗Isntthisjustsocool?这也太酷了Itissocool!Ben陷入了严重的抑郁而他需要我的帮助Benismassivelydepressed,andheneedsmyhelp.你看起来像是个真正的竞选经理了Youlooklikearealcampaignmanager.哦谢了那是因为我Google了“竞选经理”Oh,thanks,thatsbecauseIgoogledcampaignmanager*注意到他们穿很多深色衣服andnoticedthattheywearalotofdarkcolors.你看网上除了裸男之外还有很多东西可以看嘛Ann
19、See,theresmorethingstolookatontheInternetbesidesnakedguys,Ann.你说啥What?我需要团队进展汇报竞选经理Ineedateamupdate,campaignmanager.好的手♥枪♥PeteDisellio五分钟之后到Okay.PistolPeteDiselliowillbehereinfiveminutes.我还是不敢相信你请到了他Istillcantbelievethatyougothim.Ann请到了本地英雄手♥枪♥PeteDisellio来集♥会&hear
20、ts;支持我AnngotlocalheroPistolPeteDiselliotoendorsemeattherally.1992年手♥枪♥Pete在对抗Eagleton高中比赛的压哨灌篮In1992,PistolPeteslast-seconddunkagainstEagletonHigh锁住了Pawnee中部醉汉野蛮人队东山再起的胜利clinchedacomebackvictoryforthePawneeCentraldrunkensavages.手♥枪♥Pete灌篮锁定醉汉野蛮人队东山再起队伍吉祥物后来换掉了Teammascotla
21、terchanged.Akash兄弟我当然是先来找你啦Akash,buddy,ofcourseIcametoyoufirst.你是Pawnee最好的地毯人YourethebestcarpetmaninPawnee.但我的问题是-Butheresmyquestion-你的地毯和窗帘配套吗Doyourcarpetsmatchyourdrapes?“你的阴毛和头发同色吗”如何在预算紧张的情况下让任何活动上档次Howdoyoumakeanyeventclassyonabudget?红毯Redcarpet.我整个公♥寓♥都是红毯Myentireapartmentisredca
22、rpet.在那之上通向我的卧室Ontopofthat,leadingintomybedroom,是第二层红毯asecondredcarpet.哦我鞋里这是什么Oh,whatsthisinmyshoe?红毯鞋垫Redcarpetinsole.不论我去哪儿我都走在红毯上EverywhereIgo,mwalkingonredcarpet.真的有空间坐得下所有人吗Isthereevenenoughroomforeveryone?来坐我腿上不那太丢脸了Here,sitonmylap.-No,thatshumiliating.至少让我坐在Andy腿上吧CantIatleastsitonAndy,slap?
23、不那是冠军的位置他占了No,that,sChampionsspot.Hecalledit.Tom我们已经迟到了Tom,we,realreadylate.现在像个男人一样坐在那个女孩子腿上Now,beaman,andsitonthatgirlslap.是的长官Yes,sir.嗨我是PeteDisellioHi,PeteDisellio.我们可以叫你手♥枪♥对吧WecancallyouPistobright?我更喜欢Pete1preferPete.哦好吧知道了我是LeSlieKnopeOh.Okay,gotit.mLeslieKnope.我们在Pawnee中心高中一起上
24、过一年WeoverlappedayearatPawneeCentral.你可能在早间广播里听过我的声音Youprobablyremembermyvoicefromthemorningannouncements.这是我的竞选经理AnnPerkinsThisismycampaignmanager,AnnPerkins.嗨很高兴见到你进来吧Hi,nicetomeetyou.Comeonin.哦谢谢Oh,thanks.我来这里很激动-啊我们邀请到你也很激动mexcitedtobehere.-Ah!Wereexcitedtohaveyou.Ann也太厉害了我的竞选团队势不可挡Anniskillingit
25、.Mycampaignteamisunstoppable.这次集♥会♥肯定会很棒的Thisrallyisgoingtobeawesome.哦天啊我的感觉来了Oh,myGOd,Imfeelingit!我要跳霹雳舞了mgonnabreakdance!1.eslie1.eslie?来了谢天谢地Coming!ThankGod.哦冠军可比你亲得好多了宝贝Oh,Championisawaybetterkisserthanyouare,babe.不啊-是的就是Nuh-uh!-Yes,heis.他甚至比我都亲得好来试试He,sevenabetterkisserthanme.Here
26、,trysome.够了停下他在我身上流口水了Okay,stopit.Hesdroolingonme!哦哦-这不安全Oh,oh.-Thisisunsafe.哦我们应该给孩子们拉两声Oh,weshoulddoitforthekids.孩子们特喜欢Ron就给孩子们Kidsloveit,Ron.Justforthekids.嗨孩子们嘿Hi,kids!Hey!哦看啊连警♥察♥都喜欢他们在用警笛问应呢Oh,look.Thepoliceevenloveit.Theyresireningbacktous.那太棒了我要告诉他们我们听见rThatsawesome,Iwasgoingto
27、tellthemthatweheardthem.听到你了兄弟Heardya,bud!然后你就出场你灌个篮Andthen,youcomeout,andyoudunktheball,然后说投给LeSlieKnope稳如灌篮”andyousay,VotingforLeslieKnopeisaslamdunk!你还能灌篮对吧Youcanstilldunk,right?哦我可以但我不会做的Oh,Ican,butIwont.说什么Sorry?你们看不管我去哪儿1.ook,everywhereIgo,所有人都想让我聊那次灌篮那场比赛everybodywantsmetotalkaboutthatdunk,an
28、dthatgame.感觉我还是活在过去Itfeelslikemlivinginthepast.但过去很好啊吉特巴舞公共马车HermanMunsterButthepastisgreat.Thejitterbug,stagecoaches,HermanMunster.HermanMUnSter吸血鬼喜剧明斯特一家的主角听着LeSHe我看过你的介绍1.ook,Leslie,1readuponyou.你为我们的公园系统做了很多好事我很开心能给你背书YouvedonegreatstuffforourparkssystemandIwillhappilyendorseyou.作为PeterDisellioD
29、erwin火腿肉糕地区经销商但AsPeterDisellio,regionaldistributorforDerwinhamloafs,but.如果这是关于以前的我或者我17岁时做的事情ifthisisaboutwhoIwas,orwhatIdidwhenIwas17,那我就走了moutofhere.我们不用再说灌篮的事了1.etsnottalkaboutdunkinganymore.我们来说说你想做的事-好1.etstalkaboutwhatyouwanttodo.-Okay.我觉得你想灌篮Ithinkyouwanttodunk.我不会灌篮的mnotgoingtodunktheball.那上
30、篮怎么样Whataboutalayup?警官我从8岁就开始操作重型机械了Officer,IvebeenoperatingheavymachinerysinceIwaseightyearsold.现在我尊敬你和你为这个镇以及国家做出的服务Now,Irespectyouandyourservicetothistownandyourcountry,但我们具体犯了什么法呢butwhatlawsarewebreakingexactly?嗯你前排坐了四个人Well,yougotfourpeopleinthefrontseat,没人系安全带nobodyswearingaseatbelt,你在医院区域超速和鸣
31、笛youwerespeedingandblastingyourhornthroughthehospitalzone,汽车的货仓开了掉出了残骸therearofthevehicle,sopen,debrishasbeenfallingout,而且你没有开卡车的商业执照andyoudonthaveacommerciallicensetodriveatruck.好吧嗯我们对何为法律条文的构成具有不同的哲学理解Okay.Well,wehaveaphilosophicaldifferenceonwhatconstitutesalaw.请您举起双手走下汽车好吗Ineedtoseeyourhandsandc
32、ouldyoustepoutofthevehicle,please?嗨我只想跟你说我们要被逮捕了Hi.Ijustwantedyoutoknowwereabouttobearrested.哦天啊APril那也太糟糕了OhmyGod,April,thatshorrible.你们在哪儿Whereareyou?我妈屁♥股♥里真的吗帮上大忙了Mymothersbutt,really?Thatsreallyhelpful.让我来说1.etmetalktoher.April我是市政厅候选人LeslieKnopeApril,thisiscitycouncilcandidateLes
33、lieKnope.不要惹任何麻烦Donotmakeanytrouble.坐稳了我现在过来Sittight.monmyway.哇你刚刚挂了她电♥话♥吗-她已经挂掉我了Whoa.Youjusthunguponher?-Shedalreadyhunguponme.好的我要过去把他们捞出来Okay,mgoingtogodownthereandgetthemout,因为制♥服♥男人们都爱我becausemeninuniformloveme.你必须让手&hearts枪♥Pete投那个篮YouhavetogetPistolPetetoma
34、kethatshot.好吧但如果我没做到也不是大事对吧Okay,butifIdont,itsnobigdeal,right?你直接演讲就好吗-他是我们的惊喜头条人物Youlljustmakeyourspeech?-He,soursurpriseheadliner.整个镇都爱他我支持率是1%了Thewholetownloveshim.mpollingat1%.他必须灌篮AnnHemustdunk,Ann.不惜一切代价Dowhateverittakes.你知道除了出♥卖♥♥♥肉体之外的任何事Youknow,anythingshortofsex
35、ualfavors.什么我没有What?-1donot-我重复我没有Irepeat,Idonot想让你用肉体来引诱他wantyoutotempthimwithsexualfavors.我也没准备-好的我也不会Iwasn,tgoingto.-Good,Iwouldnteither.那就是我的底线ThatswhereIdrawtheline.虽然你不愿意为我做我有点冒犯Although,Iamalittleoffendedthatyouwouldntdothatforme.走-好Go.-Right.所以Ben为什么是“披咋饺”So,Ben.WhyCalzone?太高兴你问这个了ChrisGlady
36、ouasked,Chris.你知道有快餐汉堡Youknow,theresfastfoodhamburgers.有快餐墨西哥菜TheresfastfoodMexican.有快餐中餐之类之类之类的TheresfastfoodChinese.Blahblahblah.你想过为什么没有快餐意大利菜的选择吗HaveyoueverwonderedwhythereisntafastfoodoptionforItalianfood?披萨不是吗Whataboutpizza?披萨没听说过Pizza?Neverheardofit.这是人们20年后会说的Thatswhatpeoplewillbesayingin20y
37、ears,因为披萨过时了Chrisbecausepizzaisoldnews,Chris.披萨是你爷爷的披萨饺了Pizzaisyourgrandfatherscalzone.从没那么想过Neverthoughtofitthatway.我在说的是一种可携带的美味的食物Whatmtalkingaboutisaportable,deliciousmeal,是它自己的容器thatisitsowncontainer.这是意大利方便快餐的全新形式ItsawholenewspinonItalianfastcasualdining.太棒了Amazing.而你肯定比其他人更喜欢这个Andyouofallpeop
38、lewilllikethis.我会用低脂原料mgonnauselow-fatingredients.革命性啊Game-changer.而我会把我的意大利快餐新馆子叫做AndIwillcallmynewItalianfastcasualeatery”低卡批之披萨饺之角”TheLow-calCalzoneZone.1那个点子真的是我今生听到最好的点子了Thatideaisliterallythegreatestideaveeverheardinmylife.那个点子太烂了Thatideaisterrible.Glen你是要搞死我啊Glen,yourekillingme.他们违反了大概50条法律Kn
39、opeTheybrokeabout50laws,Knope.那个女孩子她试着让那条痛子狗来咬我Andthatgirl,shetriedtogetthatgimpdogtobiteme.你看我可以坐在这填完所有的表1.ook,Icouldsithereandfilloutallthepaperwork,但你和我都知道你宁愿回家去找DebrabutyouandIbothknowthatyoudrathergohometoDebra,吃一餐温馨的家庭便饭然后看看能自然发展成什么样haveanicehome-cookedmeal,anddowhatcomesnaturally.那久说不合适Thatsn
40、otappropriate.你知道我会付所有的罚款的Youknowthatmgonnapayallthefines.我在一场竞选集♥会♥之中而而而这些人是我的团队minthemiddleofacampaignrally,and-and,andthisismyteam.我需要他们拜托好吧Ineedthem,please.-Fine.但除非你们谁有商业执照否则你们不能开走那辆卜车Butunlessoneofyouhasacommerciallicense,youcanttakethattruck.这对我们意义会很重大Itwouldjustmeansomuchtous.你
41、看你可是个活着的传奇Imean,yourealivinglegend.他们现在每周五还在有线台放那场比赛TheystillairthatgameeveryFridaynightoncableaccess.是啊嗯作为活着的传奇是某种双刃剑Yeah,well,beingalivinglegendissortofadouble-edgedsword.镇上每个人依然叫我手♥枪♥EverybodyinthistownstillcallsmePistol.跟我详细讲讲PeterTellmemoreaboutthat,Peter.我觉得是的那次灌篮让我出了名1mean,yes,t
42、hatdunk,itmademefamous,但有时候butsometimes.有时候生活会灌了你的篮Sometimeslifedunksyou.嘿哥们你想出去跑个步吗Hey,man,youwanttogoforajog?就怎么说呢从蜘蛛网里跳出来释放点内啡肽Just,sortOfkickoutthecobwebs,getsomeendorphinsgoing?哦不谢了ChrisOh,no,thanks,Chris.现在正准备手撕这个黏土动画呢KindoftearingthisClaymationvideoanewonerightnow.你知道Ben我真心觉得你现在应该退后一步Youknow,
43、Ben,Ireallythinkyouneedtotakeastepbackhere.我觉得换个视角可能会有用1thinkgettingsomeperspectivewouldbegood.你在说什么呢Whatareyoutalkingabout?我认识你已经很久了veknownyoualongtime.而此时此刻你需要帮助And,rightnow,youneedhelp.帮做“黏土动”吗-帮你的生活WithmyClaymaish?-Withyourlife.你现在严重地疯狂地抑郁了Youarewildly,insanelydepressed.抑郁Depressed?我离抑郁的距离是最远的好吗
44、mthefurthestthingfromdepressed.我说看看我完成了什么Imean,lookatwhatveaccomplished.你看到他了吗Doyouseehim?你觉得一个抑郁的人能做出这个吗Doyouthinkadepressedpersoncouldmakethis?不No.我们只能装这公多了-没问题Thatsallwecanfitinhere.-Noproblem.一切都会没事的我们会没事的Thisisgoingtobefine.Wereallgoingtobefine,因为这个团队依然在一起becausetheteamisstilltogether,而这个团队无所不能
45、andtheresnothingtheteamcantdo.等等我觉得冠军想要上厕所Wait,IthinkChampionhastogotothebathroom.哦那他就在车里上Oh!Heshalldoitinthecar!接电♥话♥啊AnnAnsweryourphone,Ann.这就是在严格天主教教♥徒♥家庭里的生活ThatswhatlifeislikeinastrictRomanCatholichousehold.当然我的父亲Ofcourse,myfather,他在纪律问题上比胡萝卜还顽固hewasmorestickthancarrotwhenitcametomattersOfdiscipline.抱歉但我认识的BenWyattmsorry,buttheBenWyattthatIknow,我不觉得他坐在这儿小题大做就会开心Ijustdontthinkhedbehappysittingherefaffingaround.我没有在小题大做mnotfaffingaround.我沉浸在自己的兴趣里v
