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1、AprilApril!听着我在试着买♥♥1.isten,Iwastryingtobuy这个手工制♥作♥的B-25米切尔飞行器红木模型thishand-craftedmahoganywoodmodelofaB-25MitchellPanchitoaircraft.嗷给我的吗-别打岔Aw,forme?-Dontsassme.然后我上了这个网站这个广♥告♥弹出来AndIwenttothiswebsite,andthisadpoppedup说嘿RonSwanson看看这个好优♥惠♥thats
2、aid,Hey,RonSwanson!Checkoutthisgreatoffer.你的问题是什么Whatsyourquestion?我的问题是什么情况啊Myquestionis,whatthehell?就他们怎么知道你是谁的吗1.ike,howdidtheyknowwhoyouare?是啊好吧Yeah.-Okay.嗯有种东西叫cookiesUm,therearethesethingscalledcookies,就在你去个网站买♥♥啥的时候where,likeyougotoasiteandbuysomething,它就记住你然后创造广♥告&hearts
3、;itllrememberyouandthencreateads推荐其他你可能想买♥♥的东西forotherstuffyoumightwanttobuy.所以它学到信息吗关于我的Soitlearnsinformation?Aboutme?那看起来像是在侵犯隐私啊Thatseemslikeaninvasionofprivacy.大哥你要是觉得这就坏了Dude,ifyouthinkthatsbad,去GoogleEarth输入你的地址看看gotoGoogleEarthandtypeinyouraddress.公园与游憩公园与游憩第4季第9集第4季第9集重点是Ben和我已
4、经断断续续约会了快一年了Thepointis,BenandIhavebeendatingonandoffforaboutayear.我当然很震惊Iam,ofcourse,shocked.而且不只是因为Ben一般更喜欢高个红发AndnotjustbecauseBenusuallypreferstallbrunettes.我们卜分抱歉把你放到了这么一个位置Wereverysorryforthepositionthisputsyouin.要发生什么了Whatshappening?你是要抱我还是要打我Areyouhuggingme,orarewefighting?你是要抱还是要打让我知道Areyouh
5、uggingorfighting?Letmeknow.都不是Neitherofthosethings.我爱你们俩Ilovebothofyou.你们是模范的政♥府♥雇员Youareexemplarygovernmentemployees.“模范”这也是我们想到的词啊Exemplary?That,sthewordwewerethinkingof.嗯确实是这样-不是吗Well,itstrue.-Isntit?所以让我要说的就更加伤心了Whichmakeswhatmabouttosayevensadder.那就别说Thendontsayit.我要对你们不法行为的程度进行全面
6、调查mlaunchingafullinvestigationintotheextentofyourwrongdoing.请在周一一早在市政会议厅报到PleasereportMondayfirstthingtothecouncilchambers接受道德审判和随后的惩罚foryourethicstrialandsubsequentpunishment跟你说过我们会好受一点的Itoldyouwe,dfeelbetter.1.eslieKnope的审判嘿现在是早上六点半啊Hey,it,s6:30inthemorning.你的听证会两小时后才开始Yourhearingdoesn,tstartforan
7、othertwohours.嗯我想早点过来你知道感受一下这个房♥间Well,Iwantedtogethereearly,youknow,getafeeloftheroom.所以你是-凌晨3点Soyougothere-3:00A.M.反正我也睡不着Icouldn,tsleepanyway.嗯我想在你之前溜进来.Well,Iwantedtosneakinbeforeyougothere-一个我现在意识到不可能的荒唐白日梦anabsurdpipedreamInowrealizewasimpossible.那是给我的礼物吗Isthatapresentforme?是啊觉得怎公样Yeah.W
8、hatdoyouthink?1.i,lSebastian1.i,lSebastian.是的我在玩具商店给你定做的Yeah,1hadhimmadeforyouatthetoystore.哦谢谢你让我的生活这么美好Awfthankyousomuchformakingmylifesowonderful.不用谢我是在和他说You,rewelcome.-1wastalkingtohim.当然-但也是和你Ofcourse.-Butalsotoyou.*A1XfSi谢谢Thanks.我希望我们能一起熬过这一次Iwishwecouldgothroughthistogether.听着会没事的1.ook,itsg
9、oingtobeokay.你只会受到温和的惩罚You,rejustgonnagetaslaponthewrist,可能是短暂的停职maybeabriefsuspension.这可不行Thatsnotokay.这会写进我的永久档案的Thatsgonnagoonmypermanentrecord.我不是那种能有永久记录的人mnotthekindofpersonthathasapermanentrecord.对我来说温和惩罚就像是被踢了蛋Forme,aslaponthewristislikeakicktothenuts.我知道Iknowitis.那你身上会发生什么Whatsgonnahappento
10、you?别担心我了Dontworryaboutme.嗯你看我整天都会在外面Well,look,Illbeoutsideallday,就在墙的另外一边rightontheothersideofthatwall.所以如果你想我了就看看这个So,ifyoumissme,youjustlookatthis.满脸皱纹的丑陋怪物Wrinkled,hideousmonster你就会知道我坐在那儿支持你好吗-好andyoullknowmsittingthererootingforyou,okay?-Okay.走吧好Go.-Okay.MarcusEverettLangley是Pawnee世纪之交最伟大的律师Ma
11、rcusEverettLangleywasPawnee,sgreatestlawyerattheturnofthecentury.他的外号♥是“老石头脸”HisnicknamewasOldStoneFace因为他钢铁般的举止becauseofhissteelydemeanor也因为他在采石场遭遇事故andbecausehegotinanaccidentattherockquarry炸♥药♥炸烂了他的脸anddynamiteblewuphisface.1.eslieKnope早上好啊1.eslieKnope!Goodmorning!外面在下雪这很棒吧It
12、issnowingoutside.Isntthatgreat?你看起来心情不错啊Youseemlikeyoureinagoodmood.实际上我很悲惨Actually,mquitemiserable.我欣赏你尊重你Iadmireandrespectyou,把你拖进这个道德审判让我充满悲伤anddraggingyouthroughanethicstrialisfillingmewithsadness.我从没感觉这公低落Ihaveneverfeltsolow.嗯你散发着纯粹的快乐Well,youreradiatingpurejoy.我去找了草药医生打了两针维生素B12Iwenttomyherbal
13、istandgottwoB-12shots.然后我吃下了过量的圣约翰草AndthenIateanunreasonableamountofSt.Johnswort,我的草药医生把这个奇怪的蜂花粉膏抹在我的牙龈上andmyherbalisttookthisweirdbeepollenpasterubbeditaroundmygums.现在我的嘴感觉像是艘飞船Andnowmymouthfeelslikeaspaceship.压力太大了Thisisstressful.而压力会导致抑郁Andstressleadstodepression.如果我不保持极高量的草药补品AndifIdontmantainan
14、extremelyhighdosagesofherbalremedies,我会变得非常抑郁Iwillgetverydepressed.哦天Oh,God.现在就发生了Ifshappeningrightnow.我们今天在此确定LeslieKnopeWeareheretodaytodeterminewhetherLeslieKnope是否违反市政规定或法律violatedanymunicipalrulesorlaws因她与其上级BenWyatt的浪漫关系duetoherromanticrelationshipwithhersuperiorBenWyatt,他的听证会将在明天举♥行&he
15、arts;whosehearingwillbeheldtomorrow.你现在要进行陈述吗Wouldyouliketomakeastatementatthistime?是的Yes.我直率地承认这段关系Ifreelyadmittotherelationship,而我不会抗拒任何违反Chris的规定带来的惩罚andIwillnotbefightingthechargesthatweviolatedChris,rule.但我们没做过其他错误或不道德的事情ButWedidnothingelsewrongorunethical.1849年SarahNelsonQuindle在户外露出了手肘In1849,
16、SarahNelsonQuindleexposedherelbowoutdoors,当时是A级重罪whichwasaclassAfelony.虽然她觉得法律不公平Althoughshefeltthelawunjust,她承认她违反了法律sheacknowledgedthatshehadbrokenit,而她崇高地接受了她的惩罚-andshenoblyacceptedherpunishment像根人形冰棍样被放逐到密歇根湖漂流tobesetadriftonLakeMichiganlikeahumanpopsicle.看她看起来多镇静这就是我的感受1.ookhowcalmshelooks.That
17、showIfeel-彻底的禅意totallyzen.Knope女士你和BenWyatt的关系是哪一天开始的Ms.Knope,onwhatdaydidyourrelationshipwithBenWyattbegin?去年五月在你的要求下1.astMay,atyourrequest,Ben和我开车去Indianapolis竞标少年棒球联赛BenandIdrovetoIndianapolistobidforthestatelittleleaguetournament我们回来的那个晚上Thenightwereturned是我们第一次亲上彼此嘴的时候wasthefirsttimewekissedeac
18、hotheroneachothersmouths.亲得很棒Itwasexcellent.没必要加卜.细节抱歉我有点紧张Thatwasunnecessarytoadd.msorry.mnervous.下一个问题-Nextquestion-你曾经因为和BenWyatt的关系接受过特殊待遇吗didyoueverreceivespecialtreatmentasaresultofyourrelationshipwithBenWyatt?我得到了可爱的昵称和超棒的背部按♥摩♥Ireceivedadorablenicknamesandamazingbackrubs.哦你说专业上
19、啊没有Oh,youmeanprofessionally.No.你违反门壬何本地州级或联邦法律Anddidyoubreakanylocal,state,orfederallaw来试图掩盖和BenWyatt的关系吗inanefforttocoverupyourrelationshipwithBenWyatt?当然没有Absolutelynot.谢谢Knope女士我问完了Thankyou.Ms.Knope,thatisall.Traeger先生这上面说你要传唤14位证人出庭Mr.Traegenthissaysyouregonnabecalling14witnesses.是这样吗Isthatcorre
20、ct?呃是的先生Uh,yes,sir.14个吗为什么这么多14?Whysomany?我已经承认我违反你的规定了vealreadyadmittedthatIbrokeyourrule.不是我的规定LeslieItsnotmyrule,Leslie.是存在于任何政♥府♥的重要规定Itisanimportantrulethatexistsineverygovernment.上级和他们雇员间的浪漫关系Romanticrelationshipsbetweensuperiorsandtheiremployees会导致诈欺腐♥败♥和公♥款
21、&hearts滥用leadtofraud,corruption,andmisuseofpublicfunds.你觉得我犯下了这些罪名吗Andyouthinkmguiltyofthat?我觉得你和BenWyatt的关系开始得比你所称要强IthinkthatyoubeganyourrelationshipwithBenWyattearlierthanyouresaying.我相信你一定接受了特殊待遇Ibelievethatyoucertainlyreceivedspecialtreatment,我认为你甚至涉嫌行贿andIthinkthatyoumayevenbeguiltyofbribery.这
22、些都不是事实Noneofthosethingsaretrue.我会证明的Traeger先生AndIwillproveit,Mr.Traeger.好的休息十分钟Okay,ten-minutebreakplease.给你老板Hereyougo,boss.好的伙计们Okay,guys,我们需要应对Chris针对我的每一项指控weneedtocountereverychargethatChrishasleveledagainstme.Andy我需要证据-这就去Andy,Ineedevidence.-Gotit!等等你不知道是什么证据Wait!Youdontknowwhatevidence.啊是的好说吧
23、Ah,righton.Yes.Hitme.我桌子旁边是一张女政♥治♥家的照片-BellaAbzugNexttomydeskisapictureofafemalepoliticianBellaAbzug.BellaAbzug纽约律师众议员和妇女运动领袖拿到照片背后粘着的钥匙Getthekeythat,stapedtothebackofthatpicture.打开我最下面的抽屉里面有些文件-注意这里Itopensupmybottomdeskdrawerintherearesomefiles-payattention.你在看哪儿看这里注意这里Whereareyoulook
24、ing?Lookhere,focushere.拿到那个抽屉里的文件Getthefilesinthedrawer,然后把办公室所有文件盒子都拿过来andthengetallthefileboxesintheoffice.把文件放进抽屉我们走Putthefilesinthedrawer.Letsgo.不好我跟他去-谢谢No.-Okay,llgowithhim.-Thankyou.RonChris有14名证人Ron,Chrishas14witnesses.我需要你和所有部门头聊聊Ineedyoutotalktoallthedepartmentheads找出谁要来作证andfindoutwhosgon
25、natestify.我不知道其他部门头的名字Idontknowthenamesoftheotherdepartmentheads.我跟他去认真的吗跟这个办公室里的这些男人11gowithhim.Seriously?Withthemeninthisoffice?Ann-在Ann?-Yeah?我需要你每30秒跟我发短♥信♥说Ineedyoutotextmeevery30seconds一切都会很好-好的thateverything,sgonnabeokay.-Okay.谢了AnnThanks,Ann!我违反了一条规定我会接受温和的惩罚Ibrokeonerule,andIw
26、illacceptaslaponthewrist但如果你坐着让你的名声被毁掉Butwhenyousitbackandletyourreputationbedestroyed.你在历史里的形象就是被冻住的妓♥女♥了Yougodowninhistoryasafrozenwhore.我会反抗的mfighting.嘿我电脑拿来了我摘定了Hey,grabmycomputer.mallset.很好你下一个上Ben怎么样他伤心吗Great.Youreupnext.HowisBen?Ishesad?你需要让他振作Ann-Ben没事Youneedtocheerhimup,Ann.-B
27、enisfine.他说他很抱歉不在这里Hesayshessorryhe,snotinhere.他说看着那个怪物Hesaidtolookatthemonster.我希望你知道这是什么意思mhopingyouknowwhatthatmeans.有谣言说Chris有个关键证人TheresarumorgoingaroundthatChrishasakillerwitness.怎么为什么不可理喻啊How?Why?Thatmakesnosense.没有关键证人因为我们什么都没做错-Theresnokillerwitness,becausewedidntdoanythingwrong-除非有人准备说谎或者诋
28、毁我们unlesssomeonesplanningtolieorslanderus.好吧安全起见找到那是谁让他闭嘴Okay,justtobesafe,findoutwhoitisandsilencehim.乐意效劳-等等让我说清楚Withpleasure.-Wait.Letmemakeitclear.不用让他闭嘴保证他不能说话就行Dontsilencehim.Justmakesurehecanttalk.好的我们继续Okay,we,reback.请清场Clearthischamber,please.Perkins女士ChrisTraeger问到Ms.Perkins,ChrisTraegerha
29、squestioned我和BenWyatt的关系是何时开始的whenmyrelationshipwithBenWyattbegan.我想引导你打开收件箱找到一-封标题为“耶”的邮件dliketodirectyoutoyourinboxandspecificallyanemailentitledyay.那是Y-A然后18个Y和44个感叹号♥ThatsY-Aand18,Y,sand44exclamationpoints.是的这是一封来自你的邮件Yes,itisanemailfromyou.哦还有个附件呢Oh,andtheresanattachment.嗯有意思Mm.Intriguin
30、g.请你能播放一下这个附件吗Couldyouplaytheattachmentplease?当然Sure.在一个濒临金融崩溃的世界里Inaworldonthebrinkoffinancialmeltdown.在一个非同寻常的小镇Inatownunlikeanyother.一个有着帅脸的可爱男人Anadorablemanwithacuteface和未来的美国总统-andthefuturepresidentoftheUnitedStates什么-what?-从作为朋友wentfrombeingfriends变成了更多更多tobeingsomuchmore.AnnBen和我昨晚在一起了啊Ann!Be
31、nandIhookeduplastnight!Aah!而且我学会了用iMovieAndIlearnedhowtouseiMovie.打给我拜Callmelater!Bye!所以你收到这份邮件的日期是Sowhatwasthedateyoureceivedthatemail?呃5月12日-5月12日.Uh,May12th.-May12th.我们从IndianaPoIiS返回的第二天ThedayafterwereturnedfromIndianapolis.Haverford先生你认为LeSlieKnope是一名好雇员吗Mr.Haverford,wouldyouconsiderLeslieKnope
32、agoodemployee?TomFord在Gucci扭转了乾坤吗DidTomFordturnaroundtheHouseofGucci?我不知道但我假设是的Idonotknow,butIllassumethatthatisayes.你们做了多久的爱人Howlongwereyoutwolovers?你说什么-哦天哪Excuseme?-Oh,God.去年三月我撞见了LeSlieKnope和TomHaverford1.astmarch,IwitnessedLeslieKnopeandTomHaverfordS03E10Soulmates激♥情♥而又温柔的一吻engage
33、dinapassionateyettenderkiss.看起来Knope女士有与同事牵连的先例ItseemsthatMs.Knopehasapatternofbecominginvolvedwithherco-workers.Tom请告诉委员会为何我们在接吻Tom,willyoupleasetellthecommitteewhywewerekissing?一个在线约会网站随机配对了我们俩AnonlinedatingsiterandomlypairedUSup.所以作为玩笑我觉得假装你和我在约会会很好玩So,asajoke,Ithoughtitwouldbefunnytopretendyouan
34、dIweredating.然后你亲了我以开玩笑的方式Andthenyoukissedmeasajoke.来让我闭嘴Toshutmeup.但我们此后没再有任何浪漫的接触Butweneverhadanyotherromanticcontactafterthat.不那就像是和我姐姐的老阿姨约会No,thatwouldbelikedatingmyoldersister,selderlyaunt.不不会No,itwouldnt.嗯我们折腾了几个小时Well,we,vebeenatitforhours.我确实和几个名誉见证人都有点问题AndIdidhavesomeproblemwithmycharacte
35、rwitnesses.我不知道为什么LeSlieKnope受到审判IdontknowwhyLeslieKnopesontrial.是EthelBeavers干的EthelBeaversdidit!Beavers干的-坐下Beaversdidit!-Sitdown.我要自己蔑视法庭的规定Iwillholdmyselfincontemptofthecourt!这是跟笔记本电脑有关的吗我没打算偷的Isthisaboutthelaptop?Ididn,tmeantostealit我带回家然后我放空了我忘记了Itookithome,andIspaced.Iforgot.我会拿回来的mgonnabring
36、itback.完全能用但我在键盘上撒了意面Ittotallyworks,butIgotspaghettiinthekeyboard.什么笔记本Whatlaptop?反对Objection.但除此之外我觉得我赢rButotherthanthat,Ithinkmwinning.我驳斥了迄今为止Chris的每一条指控verefutedeveryoneofChrisclaimssofar.我这里有一张Pawnee超级套房♥汽车旅馆的收据IhavehereareceiptfromPawneeSupersuitesMotel.1.eslieKnope将这张收据申请门艮销1.eslieKnop
37、esubmittedthatreceiptforreimbursement纳税人的钱不是用来花在浪漫之旅上的Taxpayersmoneyisnotmeanttobespentonaromanticgetaway.DOnna你能描述一下那晚你看到我们时我们穿着什么吗Donna,willyoupleasedescribewhatwewerewearingtheeveningyousawus?嗯卡其裤和带领扣的衬衫-Um,khakisandbutton-downshirts你们基本的白人服装yourbasicwhitepeopleclothes.当你走进房♥间的时候看起来像什么Andw
38、henyouwalkedintotheroom,whatdiditlooklike?看起来发生了任何浪漫的事情吗Diditlooklikeanythingromantichadhappened?哦才没有呢Oh,hell,no.我也糟蹋过不少酒店房♥间了Ihaveruinedmyshareofhotelrooms,相信我那个房♥间里没有发生性相关的事情andtrustme,nothingsexualhappenedinthatroom.看起来有点像是个办公室Itkindoflookedlikeanoffice.可能是因为它就是个办公室Maybebecauseitwas
39、anoffice.市政厅在烟熏消毒CityHallwasbeingfumigated,我们需要熬夜加班andweneedtopullanall-nighter.唯一被蹂蹒过的Theonlythingthatwasravaged是Donna早前拿来的联邦拨款提案werethesefederalgrantproposalsthatDonnahaddroppedoffearlier.我看过超过200集的法律与秩序veseenover200episodesofLaw&Order,现在终于得到大回报randitspayingoffbig-time.顺便说我们拿到了拨垮-Andbytheway,wegot
40、thegramps-拨款天哦grants.God!0h.本来会是个太棒的瞬间的Itwasgonnabesuchanawesomemoment.道德委员会会议正在进行所以Ethel你去过一百万场这种道德听证会了So,EtheLyouvebeentoamillionoftheseethicshearings.你觉得我胜算有多大我说一半一半吧Whatdoyouthinkmychancesare?-dsayits50/50.你要是想赌钱的话我赌你60/40YouwanttoputmoneyoniIllgiveyou60/40against.法庭速记员赌听证会结果符合道义吗Isitethicalfora
41、courtstenographertobetontheoutcomeofahearing?你告诉我啊Youtellme.你才是被审判的那个You,retheoneontrial.RonSwanson请来证人席RonSwansontothestand,please.Swanson先生有一个提出的问题Mr.Swanson,therehasbeenaquestionposed是关于我和BenWyatt的关系何时结束的aboutwhenmyrelationshipwithBenWyattended.你能确认你有个小木屋地址是Canyouconfirmthatyouownacabin930-啊at930
42、-Ah!请停下Stop,please.我不想把我的地址给任何人Idontliketogiveoutmyaddresstoanyone,更不想被记在官方记录上muchlesshaveitonanofficialrecord.Ron别太荒谬了这很重要Ron,dontberidiculous.Thisisveryimportant.你有个小木屋在-啊Doyouownacabin-Ah!9301雪松顶一9301CedarcrestDr-9301雪松顶-哗9301CedarcrestDr-Beep!我没听到Ididnthearthat.9301雪松顶路9301CedarcrestDrive!她来了She
43、shere.谁来了Who,shere?我前妻Tammy二号♥Myex-wife-Tammytwo.我可以闻到她的分趾之间散发出的硫磺味Icansmellthesulfurcomingoffherclovenhooves.鼻子不错RonTammySwanson确实来了Goodnose,Ron.TammySwansonishere.她是我下一个证人Shellbemynextwitness.Tammy二号♥是你的关键证人吗Tammytwoisyourkillerwitness?拜托了你得要做得好一点Please!Youregonnahavetodobetter-实际上她是
44、个可怕的反♥社♥会♥者Actually,sheisaterrifyingsociopath可能会说或做任何事-whocouldsayordoanything-一个挺好的关键证人Aprettygoodkillerwitness.Swanson女士你真的如你所称Ms.Swanson,doyou,asyouclaimed,拿着可证明LeslieKnope和BenWyatt违法的证据吗haveevidencelinkingLeslieKnopeandBenWyatttolawbreaking?当然Absolutely.我有几张照片Ihaveseveralpho
45、tographs能决定性地证明-thatwilldefinitivelyprove-我想提醒你是宣誓过的MayIremindyouthatyouareunderoath,如果你撒谎我会开除你然后起诉andifyoulie,Iwillfireyouandhaveyouprosecuted.没什么Nothing.它们能决定性地证明什么也没发生Theywilldefinitivelyprovenothing.你打断我了Youcutmeoff.我可没有什么证据Idonthaveanyevidence.哦ChriS太淘气了Oh,Chrissosilly.好了拜各位Okay,bye,guys.1.eSHe审判开心哦1.eslie,havefunwiththistrial.耶Yay!我觉得我证明了Ben和我违反的唯一一条规定IthinkveproventhattheonlyruleBenandIbroke就是和彼此约会wasdatingeachother.而我也很开心没有揭露出AndIamveryhappythatIhavenotuncovered任何不道德行为的附加证据anyaddi
