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1、嘿这是什么鬼啊Hey!Whatthehellisthis?根据你的一身怒汗我想应该是我最新的预算削减提案mguessingitsmylatestbudgetcutproposalbasedonyourragesweat.首先我是怒光焕发FirstofalbIamrageglowing.第二你要砍预算的是Second,youwannacutfundingPawnee棕幅!公共迷你高尔夫forthePawneePalmsPublicPutt-Putt?P.P.P.P.P对你做了什-么啊WhatdidtheP.P.P.P.P.everdotoyou?Ron非常的反政♥府♥
2、他有那样的哲学Ronisveryanti-government,andhehasthatphilosophy,但有些东西就是不能砍掉的啊buttherearejustcertainthingsthatyoudontcut.学校警力迷你高尔夫旋转木马大游♥行♥Schools,police,mini-goltmerry-go-rounds,parades,露台修复道路和桥之类无所谓rgazeborepair,roadsandbridges,whatever.漂亮的花♥园♥蜂鸟喂食器Prettygardens,hummingbirdfeeder
3、s.我信仰砍掉无用的政♥府♥项目Ibelieveincuttinguselessgovernmentprojects.我也信仰砍掉有用的项目Ialsobelieveincuttingusefulprojects,未来的项目以及过去的项目futureprojects,andpastprojects.胡佛大坝只是个滑稽模仿罢rTheHooverDamisatravesty.你还信仰做家具呢Youalsobelieveinmakingfurniture.要不你还是去焊把椅子吧Whydontyougosolderachairinstead?你希望我用晶体管片和小电线做一把椅
4、子出来吗Doyouexpectmetomakeachairoutoftransistorchipsandsmallwires?听着迷你高尔夫场地的预算削减1.ook,thedefundingofthemini-golfcourse在明天市议会会议的日程上isontheagendaforthecitycouncilmeetingtomorrow.我很肯定你会用你标志性的活力来反对的msureyoullargueagainstitwithyourtrademarkvigor.哦我会去反对而且我会赢的Oh,Iwillargue,andmgonnawin.那片迷你高尔夫会永远在那里Thatputt-p
5、uttisgonnabearoundforever,而当我搞定的时候andwhenIamdonewithit,它吸引的游客会比胡佛大坝更多it,llattractmorevisitorsthantheHooverDam.而且它会有双倍的发电量Anditllproducedoubletheamountofelectricity.怎久做到-我会想到的How?-Illfigureitout.上面已经有风车了谁在乎呢Italreadyhaswindmills.Whocares?公园与游憩公园与游憩第5季第21集第5季第21集议员们我有事要和你们讨论Councilmen,1havesomethingto
6、discusswithyou,但在此之前我能指出你们二位今天有多帅气吗butbeforeIdo,canIjustpointouthowhandsomethebothofyoulooktoday?是啊我知道我感觉很不好Yeah,Iknow.-1feelveryill.好吧嗯明天我们要投票给迷你高尔夫场地的资金支持个人来说Okay,well,tomorrowwearevotingonfundingforthemini-golfcourse,andpersonally,我觉得它对家庭很好Ithinkitisgreatforfamilies,能很好地提供工作也极其的可爱itsagreatjobcrea
7、tor,anditsextremelycute.我在想你们二位的倾向如何mwonderingwhichwayyoutwoareleaning.嗯上次我在那里的时候Well,thelasttimeIwasthere,我看到所有种族的孩子们相处不错还在玩Isawkidsofallracesgettingalongandplaying.真的太糟糕了Itwasterrible.所以我投票反对SoImvotingtogetridofit.至少你有个好理由Atleastyouhaveagoodreason.嗯HOWSer和我一起Well,Howseriswithme.Milton和Dexhart一致Mil
8、toniswithDexhartJeremy你就是决定选票了)eremy,youretheswingvote.你觉得如何哼Whatdoyouthink?-Hmm.嗯一方面我热爱砍掉政♥府♥项目Well,ontheonehand,Ilovecuttinggovernmentprograms.另一方面迷你高尔夫太棒了Ontheotherhand,mini-golfrules.第三方面你和RonSwanson我都讨厌Andonthethirdhand,IhatebothyouandRonSwanson.所以这次而这皆有可能Sothisonecouldgoeitherway
9、.我就像是个坏蛋的未知因素mkindofabadasswildcard.嘿你今晚要干啥Hey,whatareyoudoingtonight?更像是要干谁MorelikewhoamIdoing?没人Noone.我有空怎么了mfree.Whatsup?我能来两杯啤酒和一杯冰水给我这边的朋友指定司机吗CanIgettwobeersandanicewaterformyfriendhere,designateddriver?是我吗你开车过来的啊Iam?Youdrovehere.不太晚了大哥我已经点了水了Nah,itstoolate,bro.Ialreadyorderedthewater.我不知道你要拿我
10、怎么着1dontknowwhatyouwantmetodo.Andy和我刚刚完成了一笔给红木音乐项目的巨大捐款AndyandIjustclosedabigdonationtotheRedwoodMusicProgram,一个他发现的慈善项目acharityhediscovered,所以我建议我们都出来喝酒庆祝soIsuggestedweallgooutforacelebratorydrink.但不知怎的我最后就成了指定司机AndsomehowIjustendedupbecomingthedesignateddriver.而且给所有人买♥♥单Andpayingfore
11、veryone.而且酒吧还不是我选的AndIdidntgettochoosethebar.我应该更果断一点的Ishouldbemoreassertive.哦今晚的乐队很感动我啊Aw,thebandismovingmetonight.真的很好Itsreallygood.是吗在我听起来有点蹩脚啊Really?Theysoundkindacrappytome.听起来有点像是你的一首歌♥啊宝Kindasoundslikeoneofyoursongs,babe.嗯你知道的老鼠耗子还是有点影响力的Well,youknowwhat,MouseRathasalotOfinfluence在某些本地
12、高中乐队里onsomeofthelocalhighschoolbands,主要是因为Chang给他们买♥♥啤酒之类的mostly,causeChangbuysembeerandwhatnot.等等Andy这就是首老鼠耗子的歌♥啊Wait,Andy,thisisaMouseRatsong.*张开翅膀飞吧耶*JSpreadyourwingsandfly,yeahJ那是我的乐队啊Thatsmyband.没我我还没认出来因为我是唯一重要的一个1didntrecognizeuswithoutmebecausemtheonlyonethatmatters.谢谢各位
13、Thankyou,everyone.我们是耗子老鼠WeareRatMouse.耗子老鼠吗RatMouse?好一群混♥蛋♥他们没我也去表演吗Ratbastards.Theyreplayingwithoutme?那是我写的歌♥啊喂ThatsasongIwrote!嘿宝贝我能借你的车用一个月吗Hey,baby,canIborrowyourcarforamonth?我已经把车借你了啊Ialreadylentyoumycar.你不记得我车在哪了吗Doyounotknowwheremycaris?恶我太烦这些严刑逼供了Ugh,Imsosickofthethirdd
14、egree.就像是和条子在约会It,slikedatingacop.我胀气了我们来亲热吧mgassy.Letsmakeout.啥-是What?-Yeah.闪边Moveaside!跟Mona-Lisa约会也太棒了DatingMona-Lisaisawesome.除了我一直要在恐惧中生活ExceptthatIliveinconstantfearformylife.所以我想应该做成熟的事情SoIguessitstimetodothematurethingand让另一个人帮我甩了她havesomeoneelsedumpherforme.呃Perkins来坐下Uh,Perkins,sitdown.我刚听
15、说你和Traeger可能要复合了IjustheardthatyouandTraegermightbegettingbacktogether.是啊挺好笑的对吧Yeah,itsfunny,right?我是说我们已经准备一起生一个孩子了Imean,we,realreadyplanningonhavingababytogether.我们不算是一对但是-Werenotquiteacouplebut-是酷祝贺Yeah.Cool.Congrats.听着我需要你的帮助1.isten,Ineedyourhelp.我女朋友疯了Mygirlfriendiscrazy.你约会的每一个女孩你都这么说Yousaythat
16、abouteverygirlyoudate.我当时也被你这么说Yousaidthataboutme.冷静点Ann你正在证明我的观点Calmdown,Ann.Youreprovingmypoint.认真的Mona-Lisa是真的精神错乱Seriously,Mona-Lisaislegitinsane.她有次从开着的车里跳出去买♥♥一张NickiMinaj的海报SheoncejumpedoutofamovingcartobuyaNickiMinajposter.你能帮我跟她分手吗Canyoubreakupwithherforme?我不会替你和一个女孩子分手的mnotgo
17、nnadumpagirlforyou.我把那条你特爱的绳绒毯子给你-成交11giveyouthatchenilleblanketofmineyoulovesomuch.-Deal.恶但那是我最爱的毯子啊Ugh,butthat,smyfavoriteblankie.你就不能免费做吗-不Wontyoudoitforfree?-Nope.行吧Fine.好汉两个半演员是啊特别像CourtneyThorne-SmithYeah,deadringerforCourtneyThorne-Smith.她在加油站上班Sheworksatthegasstation.好吧我需要Jamm爱上这个地方Okay,Inee
18、dtohaveJammfallinlovewiththisplace,所以我铺出了红毯somrollingouttheredcarpet.我需要你保持积极让气氛轻松起来没问题Ineedyoutostayupbeat.Keepthingslight.-Absolutely.我可以做一种.Icanbeasortof.谈话润滑剂Conversationallubricant.啊可能会有一种不那么恶心的描述但确实Yeah,theresprobablyalessgrosswaytosayit,butsure.我爱当球童Ilovebeingacaddy.这远远不只是帮忙拿球棒而已Itssomuchmore
19、thanjustcarryingclubs.是在于提供积极的强化lt,saboutofferingpositivereinforcement.生活中我将自己看做是所有人的球童Iconsidermyselfacaddytoeveryoneinmylife.进球不错Niceshot!扫得很棒Greatsweeping.加油啊鸭子Waytobe,duck.议员很好的轻击棒Councilman,niceputter.哦非常感谢Oh,thankyouverymuch.有个夏威夷胖子在我的等候室里留下的SomefatHawaiianguyleftitinmywaitingroom.他回来的时候我就像Whe
20、nhecameback,Iwasalllike,”哦呃是是没我没见到Oh,uh,yeah,yeah,no,Ihaventseenit.我不知道啊”Idontknow.经典Classic.真是个很棒又有趣的故事啊Whatagreatandfunnystory.好吧我们开始之前有谁想来个热狗吗Okay,beforewestart,anybodywantahotdog?热狗Hotdogs?你知道我有肠易激你个种族歧视YouknowIhaveirritablebowelsyndrome,youracist.噫好吧要不我请个冰棒呢Yikes,okay.Howaboutasnowconeonme?你好啊议
21、员Hello,Councilman.ChrisLeslie冰棒女士Chris,Leslie,snowconelady.我看到你们将要来一局公开的贿赂迷你高尔夫Iseeyoureabouttoplayaroundofpubliclysubsidizedmini-golf.介意我加入你们吗MindifIjoinyou?哎呀你们好啊BurlyChangWell,hello,Burly,Chang.嘿哥们咋啦Hey,man,what,sup?我就在酒吧那边Iwasjustoveratthebar,和我的同事们享受一个愉快的晚上enjoyingawonderfulnightwithmyco-worker
22、s他们都在说我有多棒然后我抬头看到了什么呢whoalltalkedabouthowawesomeIwas,andIlookup,andwhatdoIsee?一个乐队啊但你们缺少了什么呃我不知道Aband.Butyouremissingsomethinglike,uh,Idontknow,你们的主唱/词曲作者/T恤设计者/玉米片厨师yourleadsinger/songwriter/T-shirtdesigner/nachochef.咋啦-首先你的玉米片真的难吃Whatsup?-Firstofall,yournachosareterrible.没人有勇气告诉你Noone,shadthegutst
23、otellyou.你为啥不把芝士融化呢Whydontyoumeltthecheese?我们想跟你说演出的事啊哥们Wetriedtotellyouabouttheshow,man.我打过你手♥机♥已经20次了Icalledyourcell,like,20times.嗯我手♥机♥上周掉进一碗麦片了你个傻子Well,Idroppedmycellphoneinabowlofcereallastweek,youidiot.你烦到给我打电♥话♥你应该知道的Youbotheredtocallme,youdhaveknownt
24、hat.或许你该把你们的名字改成Burly和背后捅刀者们MaybeyoushouldchangeyournametoBurlyandTheBackstabbers.是个挺好的名字啊其实Thatsaprettygoodname,actually.是啊他真的很擅长想名字Yeah,hesreallygoodatcomingupwithnames.给我来瓶百威黑冠GetmeaBudweiserBlackCrown.你们这里有黑冠吗YouguysgotBlackCrownhere?如果没有你们该有Ifnot,youshould.Ron你要加入我们吗Ron,areyougonnabejoiningus?我
25、不会打的Iwontbeplaying.我只是在这提醒Jamm议员msimplyheretoremindCouncilmanJamm这个可笑的玩耍宫殿一年要花纳税人几千美元thatthisridiculousplaypalacecoststhetaxpayersthousandsofdollarsayear.这多划算啊Andwhatabargain.我是说孩子们爰大人们爱Jamm也爱Imean,kidsloveit,adultsloveit,Jammlovesit.所有人都爱Everybodylovesit.就像是地方里的玩具总动员3It,sliketheToyStory3ofplaces.是啊
26、她是对的Swanson我确实爰Yeah,shesright,Swanson.Idoloveit.你应该休息一下来根冰棒吧Youshouldrelaxalittle.Haveasnowcone.1.eslie整晚都请客1.esliesbuyingallnight.可不是吗Youdon,tsay.她在给你买♥♥冰棒Shesbuyingyousnowcones,而明天你要给她关心的议题投票andtomorrowyourevotingonanissuethatshecaresabout.嘿伙计们怎么我们要站一整天Hey,guys,what,arewegonnastandar
27、oundallday听Ron滔滔不绝关F胡扯的无关事实还是要来打andlistentoRonspoutoffunrelatedfactsaboutblah,blah,blah,orarewegonnaplay?游戏开始了Gameon.嘿各位好新闻Hey,everybody,greatnews.他们给我们发免费的铝膜气球Theygaveusfreemylarballoons.恐龙那个归我了Igotdibsonthedinosaur.还有海盗还有海豚我全都要Andthepirateandthedolphin.1wantallofem.归你了漂亮Yougot,em.-Sweet.议员上场祝二位好运T
28、heCouncilmanisaway.Goodlucktoyouboth.跟运没啥关系Chris1.uckhasnothingtodowithit,Chris.耶我能当专业选手了Yeah,Icouldbeapro!哇你也太牛了JeremyWow,youareonfire,Jeremy.享受吧-嗯哼Havingfun?-Mmhmm.我觉得这证明了这是一个很棒的地方Ithinkthisprovesthatthisisawonderfulplace给人们的生活带来欢乐thatbringsjoytopeopleslives给社区带来融合andbringsacommunitytogether.这个地方每
29、年的津贴也要花费纳税人$9000Itsalsoaplacethatcoststhetaxpayer$9,000inannualsubsidies.你俩听起来在上课Youguyssoundlikeschool.我有两条非常重要的球童信息Ihavetwoimportantpiecesofcaddyinformation.Jamm议员领先8杆CouncilmanJammleadsbyeightstrokes,而你们都即将刷新一个球场新纪录andyouarebothabouttosetacourserecord.是友谊Forfriendship.前往下一个洞Ontothenexthole.你在迎合他以
30、获取选票Youarepanderingtogetavote.比那更坏你故意在输Andworse,you,redeliberatelylosing.我没有故意在输Iamnotdeliberatelylosing.我只是今晚手气很差mhavingaveryoffnight.故意输掉是一种撒谎1.osingonpurposeisaformoflying.君子一言驷马难追Youreonlyasgoodasyourword.你想要一言是公Youwantaword,Ron?我有一言给你Ihaveawordforyou.我为了拿到Jamm的选票任何事都愿意做IwilldoanythingIcantogetJ
31、ammsvote然后他就能保证这个球场继续运行它会对这个社区有好-停下sothathewillkeepthiscourseopen,anditwillbegoodforthecommunitystop!我知道比一言要多了闭嘴Iknowitsmorethanoneword.Shutup.嗨Mona-LisaHi,Mona-Lisa?嗨我是AnnPerkinsHi.mAnnPerkins.我曾经和Tom约会过-哦好吧IusedtodateTom.-Oh,okay.我们可以来但我会咬你的Wecandothis,but1willbiteyou.那是把螺丝刀“不我不想打架Isthatascrewdriv
32、eno,Idonotwanttofight.不好吧No.-Okay.我只想和你来段女人对女人的对话Ijustwannatalktoyouwoman-to-woman因为我挺了解TOm的becauseIknowTomprettywell.你知道他的银行卡PIN码吗DoyouknowhisATMpin?因为我解不出那个小姨♥子♥的密♥码♥CauseIcannotcrackthatlittlebitchscode.我不知道Idont.你知道他曾经怎么把我逼疯吗Youknowwhatusedtodrivemenuts?他完全是个控制狂Heisat
33、otalcontrolfreak.我是说你得在每个表面上放上一个杯垫1mean,youhavetoputacoasterdownoneverysurface,而最差的部分是它们都是andtheworstpartis,they,reall用Diddy在Instagram上发的图做成的madeoutofpicturesfromDiddy,sInstagram.Diddy上了InStagram啊Diddy,sonInstagram?我怎么不知道Diddy上了Instagram啊蠢货们HowdidInotknowthatDiddywasonInstagram,youjagweeds?你对谁喊呢-蠢货们
34、Whoareyouyellingat?-Thejagweeds.你为啥还在我面前呢Whyareyoustillinfrontofme?我跟乐队了断了mdonewiththatband.我是说我现在是个成年人了你知道吗Imean,manadultnow,youknow?我有两份兼♥职♥的工作了拜托Iworktwopart-timejobs.Hello.我不需要那种每几周就要和朋友们玩吉他的压力Idontneedthestressofplayingguitarwithmyfriendseveryfewweeks.是啊而且看看他们没有你有多烂Yeah,pluslookho
35、wbadtheyarewithoutyou.Burly也太糟糕了Burlysterrible.实际上作为伴唱歌♥手他的歌♥喉真的很美妙Heactuallyhasareallybeautifulvoiceforabackupsinger.对啊我就是那个意思Right,that,swhatImeant.我爱Andy但完全诚实起见IloveAndy,buttobeperfectlyhonest,老鼠耗子的音乐真不是我的菜MouseRatsmusicisnotmything.我真的只听比如德国死亡雷鬼Ireallyonlylistento,like,GermanDeathR
36、eggae还有50年代的万圣节音效录音andHalloweensoundeffectsrecordsfromthe1950s.音乐剧演员还有BetteMidlerAndBetteMidler.显然Obviously.你猜怎么着我要从音乐退休了Youknowwhat,mretiringfrommusic.AndyAndy-结束了Andy.Andy.-Done.但首先不能没有Butnotwithoutfirst一场巨大告别表演独唱amonsterfarewellperformancesolo今晚在这个舞台上各位onthisstagetonight,everybody.我得给这些傻子们看看他们犯了多
37、大的错误mashowtheseidiotswhatabigmistaketheymade.我需要一张纸我需要一根笔我需要再来四瓶啤酒Ineedpieceofpaper,Ineedapen,1needfourmorebeers,我需要一个电脑风扇我需要一道灵感的闪电Ineedacomputerfan,Ineedalightningboltofinspiration.写歌♥时间到It,ssongwritingtime.你需要电脑风扇干啥Whatdoyouneedacomputerfanfor?有时候你用一吉电脑它变得很热Sometimeswhenyouuseacomputer,itg
38、etshot,然后风扇就能降温andthefancoolsitdown.你知道我觉得你对Tom的财务状况很理解这事儿挺好的Youknow,IthinkitsgreatthatyourecoolwithTomsfinancialsituation.你在港峰啊Whatareyoutalkingabout?Tommy有自己的生意啊Tommyownshisownbusiness.是啊但他借了一大堆的钱Yeah,buthehadtoborrowalotofmoney,而且你不在的时候andwhenyourenotaround,Tom喝的是自来水Tomdrinkstapwater.啥What?打扰一下Ex
39、cuseme.你破产啦Yourebroke?呃是啊超级破产你很心烦吗Uh,yeah,superbroke.Areyouupsetaboutthat?嗯是啊因为我不搞穷逼的Mm,yeah,causeIdonteffwithpoorsies.但感谢来自我新最好朋友的警告Butthankstoawarningfrommynewbestfriend,我不需要了行吧Idonthaveto,okay?我们完了你很棒Weredone,youreawesome,我甚至一般不喜欢波多黎各妞andIdontevenusuallylikePuertoRicanchicks.我不是-我是说是无关的但我-mnot-Im
40、ean,itshouldntmatter,butm-你要和我分手吗Yourebreakingupwithme?哦天啊也太糟糕了Oh,man,thatsucks.是啊结束了我们去跳一段Thatsright.Itsover.Letsgodance.救命Help.恶我根本走不了运啊Ugh,Icannotcatchabreak.你最好找到那,击KnopeYoubetterfindyourstroke,Knope.伙计们我要让JUIie回家了Guys,mgonnaletJuliegohome.已经太晚了而且Jeremy把所有糖浆吃完Itsgettinglate,andJeremyseatenallthe
41、syrup.谢谢在你旁边工作是我的荣幸Thankyou.Itsbeenanhonorworkingalongsideyou.谢谢-哇哇哇等等Thanks.-Whoa,whoa,whoa.Holdup.冰棒是一半的快乐呢Snowconesarehalfthefun.是啊JUlie你能留下吗拜托Yeah,Julie,couldyoustay,please?我还有微积分作业我一Ihavecalculushomework.I-哦嗯数学在现实生活中也没作川啊Oh,well,mathisworthlessinreallife.我是说计算小费有app呢1mean,theresanappforcalculat
42、ingtips.你只需要这个了Thatsallyouneed.数学非常的重要Mathisveryimportant,尤其对于年轻女性别退学especiallyforyoungwomen.Stayinschool.我陈述了我的观点Leslie陈述了她的vemademypoint.Lesliehasmadehers.你要投向哪一边呢议员Whichwayareyouvoting,Councilman?呃嗯我对这个预算事情还是骑墙态度Uh,well,mkindofstillonthefenceaboutthisbudgetthing,但我确实喜欢看你们为我争吵butIdolovewatchingyou
43、guyssquabbleoverme.你们确实让这个男的感觉像一位女士Yousuremakeaguyfeellikeareallady.怪Weird.好要不这样Allright,howaboutthis?你俩互相对打Youtwoplayeachother.九个洞羸家得到我的投票Nineholes.Winnergetsmyvote.我乐意Ron呢mgame.Ron?一场双方都尽全力对抗的运动比赛Anathleticcompetitionwherebothpartiesarecompetingtheirhardest当然比现在这种不论如何的做戏要更高尚iscertainlymorehonorabl
44、ethanwhateverthischaradeis.在这块悬而未决的场地上举♥彳j：♥的加时延长赛Suddendeathplayoffontheverycoursethathangsinthebalance.我真的可能会晕倒Icouldliterallyfaint如果我没有无懈可击的血压的话ifIdidnthaveimpeccablebloodpressure.哦嘿各位Oh,hey,everybody.我的名字是AndyDwyerMynameisAndyDwyer.你们对我的认知可能是那个之前被认识为Youprobablyknowmeastheartistform
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