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1、好了各位看看你们的文件夹里Okay,everyone.Lookinyourfolders.你们会找到关创立者周的信息Youwillfindinformationaboutfoundersweek.而在我们开始头脑风暴之前AndbeforeWestartbrainstorming,我只想谢谢Ron借给我们他的小木屋IjustwannathankRonforlendingushiscabin.借吗1.ending?说得像是我有选择样MakesitsoundlikeIhadachoiceinthematter.我就不该答应这事儿或者让你们知道我有个小木屋Inevershouldveagreedtot
2、hisorletyouknowthatIhaveacabin或者认识你们任何人orgottentoknowanyofyou.就是这个精神Thatsthespirit.创立者周是关于Pawnee一切的年度庆祝活动FoundersweekisayearlycelebrationofallthingsPawnee.我们有吃馅饼比赛Wevegotapie-eatingcontest,一个巨大的抚摸动物园agiantpettingzoo,还有所有活动的爷爷andthegranddaddyofthemall,创立者周大游♥行♥thefoundersweekparade.2012
3、年创立者周大游♥行♥我不想过分吹捧Idontwannaover-hypeit,玫瑰碗年度美国大学橄榄球比赛但我们的游♥彳j♥让玫瑰碗的游♥彳j♥butourparademakestherosebowlparade看起来像上门送屎大会looklikeaturds-on-wheelsconvention.我们来做个练习1.etsdoanexercise.APriI什么让Pawnee成为世界上最好的城市April,whatmakesPawneethebestcityintheworld?简单人均最多谋杀案Easy:M
4、ostmurderspercapita.断头台是在这里发明的Theguillotinewasinventedhere.市政厅是由海象黑♥手♥党♥负责运转的CityHallisrunbythewalrusmafia.Donna帮帮我是什么Pawnee这么棒Donna,helpmeout.WhatmakesPawneesogreat?生活开销很低Costoflivingischeap.差不多三年之后我就能攒够钱Inaboutthreeyears,Iwillhavesavedenough还清我在西雅图的公♥寓♥topayoffmy
5、condoinSeattle.你在西雅图有公♥寓♥YouhaveacondoinSeattle?是的我喜欢那里的雨和鱼市Yes,Iliketherainandthefishmarkets.伙计们我们得集中注意力Guys,weneedtofocus.我想让这次成为最好的创立者周好吗Iwantthistobethebestfoundersweekever,okay?别分心了Nomoredistractions.我好无聊我们找个树上做♥爱♥mbored.Let,sgohavesexinatree.他八分钟之后回来Hellbebackineigh
6、tminutes.你为什么要带她来这里啊Whydidyouhavetobringherhere?我在这段关系里真的没有任何权力Idontreallyhaveanypowerinthisrelationship.我会在树上想主意的1Ithinkofideasinthetree.任何人都欢迎来树上加入我们Anyoneswelcometojoinusinthetree!公园与游憩公园与游憩第5季第22集第5季第22集真的吗Really?好吧谢谢Okay.Thankyou.拜Bye.你还好吗Youokay?嗯我没事Yeah,mfine.早上好啊Goodmorning,同事们同僚们朋友们colleagu
7、es,co-workers,friends.所有人觉得正常吗.Everyonefeelingnormal.今天today?事情是这样的Hereswhathappened.我把运动衫掉在了Ron的小木屋IleftmysweatshirtatRonscabin.等我回去拿的时候我在垃圾里找到了这个WhenIwentbacktogetit,Ifoundthisinthetrash:阳性的验孕棒Positivepregnancytest.顺便说我意外扔掉了我的运动衫Sidenote:Iaccidentallythrewmysweatshirtaway.所以我才在垃圾里翻着呢Thatswhy1wasdi
8、ggingthroughthetrash.那个也找到了挺酷的Foundthattoo.Prettycool.所以如果我的科学是对的Soifmyscienceiscorrect,曾在小木屋的五个女人之一-oneofthefivewomenwhowereatthecabin-LeslieDonnaAnnMona-Lisa或者April-Leslie,Donna,Ann,Mona-Lisa,orApril-怀孕了ispregnant!不会是AprilCantbeApril.她肯定会告诉我的Shewouldvetoldme.那就剩下四个嫌疑犯Thatleavesfoursuspects.只有一个人胜任
9、这份工作Theresonlyonemanforthisjob:BertMacklinFBIBertMacklin,FBI.他们说我退休了TheysaidIwasretired.他们说我太危险不能去Pawnee警局TheysaidIwastoodangerousforthePawneePoliceDepartment.结果他们是对的Turnsouttheywereright.也是错的andwrong.MacklinMacklin,你个嫁♥子♥养♥的♥yousonofabitch.各位Pawnee居民大家好Hello,fellowPawnee
10、ans.众所周知创立者周庆祝活动明天开始Asyouknow,thefoundersweekfestivitieskickofftomorrow.呃一条小小的公告Um,onesmallannouncement:因为一场悲惨的误解Duetoatragicmisunderstanding,最美小猪选美大赛theprettiestpigbeautypageant替换为猪排骨烧烤大赛hasbeenreplacedbyaporkribbarbecuecompetition.哦不Oh,no.转到没那么恐怖的新闻Butontolessgrislynews,感谢各位参与我们创立者周特别公共论♥坛&
11、hearts;thankyouforparticipatinginourspecialfounder,sweekpublicforum主持人是女议员LeslieKnopeledbycouncilwomanLeslieKnope.由J二一些非常专注的人♥民♥公仆的努力工作Thankstoalotofhardworkandsomeverydedicatedcivilservants,今年对于我们市是得意的一年thishasbeenabanneryearforourcity.肥胖和糖尿病减少了Obesityanddiabetesaredown.考试分数上升了Testsco
12、resareup.Pawnee的浣熊袭击概率降低了Pawneeraccoonattackshavedecreased.人们在我们的公园百货店和医院里突然开始觉得安全了Peoplecannowsuddenlyfeelsafeinourparks,grocerystores,andhospitals.我对我们做到的事情非常自豪Iamveryproudofwhatweveaccomplished.实际上这次论♥坛♥Infact,thisforum.就像是我庆祝胜利跑的那一圈iskindofmyvictorylap.我今天在此问你们一个问题Iamheretodaytoask
13、youonequestion.现在的你们比一年前更好了吗Areyoubetteroffnowthanyouwereayearago?谁来开始啊哦Whodliketostart?Uh-oh.KathrynPinewood来自Pawnee餐饮协会KathrynPinewood,PawneeRestaurantAssociation.这个镇没有更好Thistownisnotbetteroff.过去的一年是场灾难Thispastyearhasbeenadisaster,这个政♥府♥正在固执地剥夺我们最基本的个人自♥由♥andthisgovernm
14、entishell-bentonstrippingawayourmostbasicpersonalfreedoms.好的反方观点Okay,counterpoint.Pinewood女士我从未剥夺过任何人的自♥由♥Ms.Pinewood,veneverstrippedawayanyonesfreedoms.8个月前我只是阻止了一家餐厅Isimplystoppedarestaurant向它的顾客们销♥竹♥精神错乱的14公斤装的汽水fromservinganinsane500-ouncesodatoitscustomers,这只让我们的市民们更
15、加健康了whichonlymadeourcitizenshealthier.实话说我没看到有任何市民站出来抱怨-Andfrankly,Idontseeanyofthosecitizensstandingupandcomplainingabo-哦现在我看到了Okay.Now,Iseethem.哇DaITen慢点Whoa!Darren!Slowdown!那件运动服不是用来运动的好吗Thatsweatsuitsnotforsweatinin,okay?这可是拷花丝绒Thisiscrushedvelvet.如果你比快走的速度更快它会碎掉的Ifyougoatmorethanabriskwalk,itwi
16、llfallapart.这顶好JB♥我们来付钱吧Thislooksdope.Letspayforit生意正蓬勃呢Businessisbooming.如果持续这样的话我会离开公园部Ifitkeepsuplikethis,IwouldleavetheParksDepartment然后全职做“租个型”甚至可能扩大规模anddoRent-A-Swagfull-time,maybeevenexpand.我可以在那边加一个宝宝区域Icouldaddababysectionoverthere,叫做“小小型”callit,Li,lSwaggers.我可以加点老人的东西叫做“租个垂”Icoulda
17、ddsomeoldPeoPIestuff,callitRent-A-Sag.恶不要老人很恶心Ugh,no.Oldpeoplearegross.哦棒Oh.Nice.嘿傻尾♥我能1可家吗Hey,dingdong!CanIgohome?我肚肚感觉很恶心Mytum-tumfeelsgross,而且我讨厌工作andalso,Ihateworking.我想行但找个人帮忙代工好吧Iguess,butfindsomeonetocoverforyou,okay?因为我们现在真的很忙Causewe,rereallybusyrightnow.还有一个律师家伙打给门尔Also,alawyerguycal
18、ledyou.他在电♥话♥里听起来真的很性感Hesoundedreallysexyonthephone,而我非常的喜欢andIwasveryintothat.就我就非常的喜欢1.ike,Iwas,like,veryintothat好吧我们来设点边界Allright,letssetupsomeboundaries特别是你该怎么对我说话好吧onwhatscoolforyoutosaytome,okay?好吧我有一次法式了我表哥Okay.Ifrenchedmycousinonetime.恶心Thatsgross.我可能还爱着他Imightstillbeinlovewith
19、him.请离开好吧拜Pleaseleave.-Allright,bye.TomHaverford我的名字是TrevorNelssonTomHaverford,mynameisTrevorNelsson.我代表的客户想给你出个价Irepresentaclientwhowouldliketomakeyouanoffer.Babyface听了我的demo吗Babyfaceheardmydemo?我愿意出唱片的Iwillacceptarecorddeal.不你深深地误解了No,youdeeplymisunderstand.我的客户对“租个型”有兴趣Myclienthastakenaninteresti
20、nRent-A-Swag.他想知道你有没有想法Hedliketoknowifyouarelooking销♥售♥商店的可控制股权tosellacontrollinginterestinthestore.哇吹牛老爹想买♥♥下租个型”吗Whoa,DiddywantstobuyRent-A-Swag?不是我说的-信息量很大啊NotwhatIsaid.-Thisisalottoprocess.吹牛老爹会来开会吗WillDiddybecomingtothemeeting?我没有告诉你我客户是谁的许可权mnotatlibertytotellyouwho
21、myclientis.会违反保密协议Itwouldviolateconfidentiality.我理解-不是吹牛老爹Iunderstand.-It,snotDiddy.知道了Gotit.哦-哦你好AnnOh.-Oh,hello.Ann.哦天你想要啥MacklinOh,boy.Whatdoyouwant,Macklin?我吗Me?只是在观察一点点他们在总部教我们的东西Justobserving.AlittlesomethingtheytaughtusdownatQuantico.嗯我想我就不继续烦你了Well,Iguessllgetoutofyourhair.等等只剩下一个问题Wait,ther
22、eisjustonemorequestion.祝贺你-那是个问题吗Congratulations.-Isthataquestion?那是个指控因为我知道你的秘密了Itsanaccusation,causeIknowyoursecret.你怀孕了-啥我没怀孕啊Yourepregnant.-What?mnotpregnant.你没有吗该死那是谁Yourenot?Damnit.Whois?因为我在RonSwanson的小木屋发现了这个CauseIfoundthisatRonSwansonscabin.是个验孕棒It,sapregnancytest.哦天我们认识的人怀孕了吗Oh,myGod.Someo
23、neweknowispregnant?我还想怀孕呢那不公平啊mtryingtogetpregnant.Thatsnotfair.我是说太好了为他们开心祝贺啊之类的Imean,great,andhappyforthem,andcongratulations,whatever,但哦不呸butooh!No!Boo!我们得找出这是谁Wehavetofindoutwhothisis.哇我不觉得BertMacklin单打独斗Whoa,Idontthinkso.BertMacklinworksalone.午饭我请Iwillbuylunch.你想吃多少汉堡都行Youcanhaveasmanyburgersas
24、youwant.欢迎加入FBIWelcometotheFBI.Pinewood女士Leslie的公共卫生侣议是一次巨大的成功Ms.Pinewood,Lesliespublichealthinitiativehasbeenahugesuccess.Pawnee已经不是美国第四大肥胖的城市了PawneeisnolongerthefourthmostobesecityinAmerica.我们是第九Werenowninth.全镇累积我们减掉了等同于800只怀孕海牛的体重Together,asatown,welostanamountofweightequalto800pregnantmanatees.一
25、家健身房♥开张了而且还持续营业Agymopened,anditstayedinbusiness.而且人们在咽下一整张糖纸之后去急救的数量减少了40%AndpeoplecheckingintotheE.R.afteringestingawholecandywrapperisdown40%.那什么才是尽头呢Butwherewillitend?你通过攻击Sweetums校园午餐项目想夺走孩子们的快乐Now,youwannarobourchildrenoffunbyattackingtheSweetumsschoollunchprogram,真的在从宝宝手里夺糖果literallytak
26、ingcandyfrombabies.那些学校午餐极其的不健康Thoseschoollunchesareincrediblyunhealthy.你们居然怎么说服了学校董事会称餐巾纸是种蔬菜Yousomehowconvincedtheschoolboardthatnapkinsareavegetable.他们是植物做的啊Theyremadefromplants.不要再限制我们的自♥由♥了Stoprestrictingourfreedoms.是啊Yeah!我的名字是保洁部门的DeweyMynameisDeweyfromSanitation.4个月前自从你让我们雇佣女人剥
27、夺了我们的自♥由♥之后Eversinceyoustrippedusofourfreedomsbymakingushirewomen,我们只能把其中一间厕所改造成了女用厕所wevehadtoturnoneofourbathroomsintoawomansbathroom.我们只有一间厕所了Weonlyhaveonebathroomnow.很抱歉Deweymsosorry,Dewey.听起来像是为琐碎如性别平等的小事付出了可怕的大代价呢Thatsoundslikeahorriblepricetopayforsomethingastrivialasgenderequali
28、ty.所以你也同意啊Soyouagree.3个月前BjornLerpiss来自Pawnee的Lerpiss家族BjornLerpissofthePawneeLerpissfamily.我家旁边的平地上应该有家大肚汉堡的TherewassupposedtobeaPaunchBurgerinthislotnexttomyhouse.然后你建了个公园剥夺了我的自♥由♥Andthen,youstrippedmyfreedombyputtingaparkthere.现在如果我想用一个三层煎饼早餐披萨开始我的一天Now,ifIwannastartmydayoffwithatri
29、ple-deckerpancakebreakfastpizza,我得走十分钟去另一家Igottagototheonethats10minutesaway,那让我每天上班迟到20分钟andthatmakesme20minuteslatetoworkeveryday.我在家上班Iworkathome.你考虑过早饭不要吃那个吗Haveyoueverconsiderednoteatingthatforbreakfast?我永远不会考虑的llneverconsiderthat.很奇怪这感觉像是个人攻击Thisfeelsstrangelypersonal.可能是因为他们都在站出来Maybeit,sbeca
30、usetheyreallstandingup说有多讨厌我这个人sayinghowmuchtheyhatemeasaperson.我在跟多少人讲话呢DonnaHowmanypeopleamItalkingto,Donna?一个还是一又1/9个Oneor11/9?你在问我是不是怀孕吗Areyouaskingmeifmpregnant?哦有意思Oh.Interesting.我不记得说过任何Idontremembersayinganything关于任何人怀孕的事情aboutanyonebeingpregnant.你确定不是你吗Areyousureit,snotyou?我是个头上有脑子的成年女性magr
31、ownwomanwithagoodheadonhershoulders.别担心我Dontworryaboutme.哟这个案子刚刚开始变得有趣了Whew.Thiscasejustgotinteresting.嗯不是刚Well,notjust.一开始就挺有趣的Itwasprettyinterestingtobeginwith.这个案子就依然很有趣Thiscasejustremainedinteresting.听着我老婆和我没有感觉比一年前更好1.isten,mywifeandIdonotfeelthatwerebetteroffthanayearago因为一年前这个镇还不是一个恐怖的淫窝becau
32、seayearago,thistownwasnotahorrifyingsexden每个人都可以把身体部位随便放哪免受惩罚wherepeoplecouldputtheirbodypartsanywheretheywantwithimpunity.然后你当选了Andthen,youwereelected.而现在这个镇就是一个恐怖的淫窝Andnow,thistownahorrifyingsexden每个人都可以把身体部位随便放哪免受惩罚wherepeoplecouldputtheirbodypartsanywheretheywanttowithimpunity.是啊-如果你们指的是我做全面性教育的
33、抗争Yeah.-Ifyouarereferringtomyfighttoteachcomprehensivesexeducation,你们至少要承认一个事实youneedtoatleastacknowledgethefact就是性病去年至今减少了14%thatSTDsaredown14%fromlastyear.而Pawnee的越轨行径增加了百分之十亿-不是-AnddeviantbehaviorinPawneeisupabillionpercent!-No,it,s-不是-这个镇要在盗版Gucci手提包中下地狱妹子no,it,s-ThistownisgoingtohellinaGuccikno
34、ck-offhandbag,girl.你看你看See?See?他们同意对吧Theyagree.Comeon.我肯定比一年前要好多了Iamdefinitelybetteroffthan1wasayearago,而这都归功于LeslieKnoPeanditsallthankstoLeslieKnope.这个女人单手拯救了我的生意Thiswomansingle-handedlysavedmybusiness.谢谢你DenniS你看完美的例子Thankyou,Dennis.Thereyougo,perfectexample.没必要问那个更多问题rNoneedforfurtherquestionsont
35、hatone.哦很抱歉你的生意是什么呢先生Oh,msorry.Whatisyourbusiness,sir?哦我开的是一家色情DVD租借中心Oh,IrunapornographicDVDemporium.嗯它曾经是一个古怪的小小的影视租赁点有很高的社区价值Well,itusedtobeaquaint,littlemovierentalplacewithalotofcommunityvalue.哦现在好太多了是啊Oh,itsmuchbetternow.-Yeah!1.eslie是最棒的-不不Brandi1.eslieisthebest.-No,no,Brandi.哎哎哎哎各位大家好Gah,gah
36、,gah,gah-Hello,everyone.我是BrandiMaxxxx.-嗨BrandimBrandiMaxxxx.-Hi,Brandi.超级魔术师很多电影的主演包括超级魔术属♥StarofsuchfilmsastheincredibleBurtWonderbone,好人难寻好人难睡以及逃离德黑兰AGoodGuytoLayHard,andArgo.我在逃离德黑兰里演了个小角色IhadasmallpartinArgo还有色情版本的套里的黑男aswellasthepornversionOurGoo.我看了前90秒veseenthefirst90seconds.很令人兴奋It,s
37、thrilling.如果不是因为LeSIieKnopeIfitwerentforLeslieKnope,这个镇上的色情内容会少很多很多therewouldbefar,farlesspornographyinthistown.不发生的事情是个误会No,whathappenedwastherewasamisunderstanding,而我意外让政♥府♥卷入了不体面的生意andIaccidentallygotthegovernmentinvolvedinanunseemlybusiness,但我已经澄清了一切都很好butIclearedthatup,andeverythi
38、ngsfine.又不是我是某种热衷性&hearts覆♥的疯子之类的Itsnotlikemsomekindofsex-crazedmaniacorsomething.1.eslie你怀孕了吗1.eslie,areyoupregnant?你是不是在森林里的一个垃圾堆中留下了这个阳性的验孕棒Didyouordidyounotleavethispositivepregnancytestinadumpsterinthewoods?嘿大家好Hey,everybody.没有真的吗No.-Really?好吧嗯我就不打扰你了Okay.Well,llgetoutofyourhair.抱歉打断Sorr
39、ytointerrupt.那是BrandiMaxxxx吗WasthatBrandiMaxxxx?投资者们我有些关于“租个型”的激动消息Investors,IhavesomeveryexcitingnewsaboutRent-A-Swag.有人-我没说是吹牛老爹Someone-mnotsayingDiddy,但我也没说不是吹牛老爹-butmnotnotsayingDiddy-提出用一大笔钱收♥购♥“租个型”hasofferedtobuyoutRent-A-Swagforabuttloadofmoney.多大一笔孩子Howbigabuttload,son?我们基本上都能
40、将投资金额翻番Wewouldallbasicallydoubleourinvestments.你开玩笑吗卖♥♥啊宝贝Areyoukiddingme?Sell,baby.想象一下我们用这些利润能有什么样的“款待自己”日啊Imaginethekindoftreat-yourselfdaywecouldhavewiththeprofits.我说的是美甲上美甲再上美甲mtalkingpedicuresonpedicuresonpedicures.挺吸引人的Thatisappealing.如果有人对收♥购♥你感兴趣Ifsomeoneisintere
41、stedinbuyingyouout,那意味着你做了些对的事情itmeansyou,redoingsomethingright.我建议你继续发展积累力量找到这个投资人Isayyoucontinuetogrow,accumulatepower,findthisinvestor,然后买♥♥下他的生意给他上-课andbuyhisbusinesstoteachhimalesson.APril你觉得呢-我对此思考了很多April,whatdoyouthink?-1thoughtaboutthisalot.我实际上觉得你应该搞个HelloKitty”的纹身Iactuallyth
42、inkthatyoushouldgetaHelloKittytattoo.不说的是这个店哦No,withthestore.-Oh.呃烧掉换保险钱Uh,burnitfortheinsurancemoney.Tom听我说如果我学到了一课-Tom,listentome,iftheresonethingveIearned-天啊没人在乎Gary-够了God,nobodycares,Gary.-Enough.谢谢-我想你们了Thankyou.-1missyouguys.真是个精彩的活动啊所有人都玩得很开心Whatawonderfulevent.Everyoneishavingfun.这也太棒了Thisis
43、great.Chris拜托你Chris,couldyoujustplease.抱歉我只是想让你振作一点msorry,Iwasjusttryingtocheeryouup.坚持住.谢了Justhanginthere.-Thanks.好了失陪一下我今早才发现Allright,ifyoullexcuseme,Ifoundoutthismorning我在这次游♥行♥中会扮演一个特殊角色thatIamplayingaspecialroleinthisparade.不剧透Nospoilers.亲爰的我不想说明显的事情Honey,Ihatetostatetheobvious,但你
44、选择在政♥治♥中生活butyouchosealifeinpolitics.我是说你实际完成的事情越多Imean,themoreyouactuallyaccomplish,你越会引来热度themoreheatyouregonnadraw.是我知道我们去看游♥行♥Yeah,Iknow.-Letsgowatchtheparade.你知道你不会拒绝游♥行♥的Youknowyoucantresistaparade.确实是Thatstrue.i游♥行♥和你的屁♥月殳♥
45、Paradesandyourbutt:又来了-我的两大恶习Thereyougo.-Mytwovices.哇你在干啥呢Whoa,whatareyoudoing?我的助手有些东西要展示给你Myassistanthassomethingshedliketoshowyou.是搭档Partner.哦我的助手有些东西要展示给你搭档Oh,myassistanthassomethingshedliketoshowyou,partner.是一根阳性的验孕棒TomIfsapositivepregnancytest,Tom.在我们头脑风暴之后我在Ron的小木屋外面找到的IfounditoutsideofRonscabinafterourbrainstormingsession.有Mona-Lisa怀孕的可能性吗IsthereanypossibilityMona-Lisacouldbepregnant?我们总是用保护措施的Wealwaysuseprotection.但我挺肯定她会在里面戳洞butmprettypositiveshepokesholesinthem.是哪个牌子的验孕棒啊Whatbrandpregnancytestisit?歌♥名(Whoomp!
