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1、好了Ron我Li经忍♥够我们讨论下Diane准妈妈派对的计划Okay,Ron.Enoughsenough.LetstalkplansforDianesbabyshower.苍天啊女人三个主要活动-DearGod,woman.-Threemainactivities-宝宝宾果宝宝食物试吃babybingo,babyfoodtasting,还有我的个人最爱-宝宝连体衣装饰小站andmypersonalfavoritebabyonesiedecoratingstation.我要把我的打扮得像宇航员mgonnamakeminelooklikeanastronaut.你在那太空里干嘛呢宝宝
2、啊太可爰了好的Whatareyoudoingupthereinspace,baby?Ah!Socute!Okay.我有些礼物的点子我看到了一辆非常可爱的婴儿车Ihavesomegiftideas.Iwaslookingataveryadorablestroller.我们已经有婴儿车了Wealreadyhaveastroller.哦可恶真的吗Oh,shoot.Really?我只能考虑其他东西了mgonnahavetothinkofsomethingelse.哦天啊那是谁的宝宝啊Oh,myGod,whosebabyisthat?那就是我的Thatwouldbemine.伙计们进来啊Ron有个宝宝了
3、Guys,getinhere!Ronhasababy!哦Ron挺酷的宝宝-谢谢你AndrewOh,Ron,coolbaby.-Thankyou,Andrew.所有人我想向你们介绍我的儿子Everyone,dliketointroduceyoutomyson,John中间名划掉SWanSonJohnmiddlenameredactedSwanson.John是一段时间之前出生的体重是几磅多少盎司Johnwasbornsometimeago,weighingmultiplepoundsandseveralounces.就像他的父亲一样他是沉默的爱好者Muchlikehisfather,heisaf
4、anofsilence.请你们保持小声Pleasekeepyourvoicesdown.我怎么能保持小声你都有了孩子HowamIsupposedtokeepmyvoicedownwhenyouhadyourbaby,而且你还没告诉我你有了孩子andyoudidnttellmethatyouhadyourbaby?你为什么需要知道这种事情我为什么哦天哪Whywouldyouneedtoknowsomethinglikethat?-WhywouldIoh,myGod.我甚至没给Diane准备礼物IhavenotevensentDianeagift.她就在那游荡Shesjustwalkingarou
5、nd,疑惑我为什么还没给她送礼物wonderingwhyIhaventsentheragiftyet.我们应该做什么吗-就让她自己累下来Shouldwedosomething?-Justlethertireherselfout.如果你需要我们帮任何忙Ron请告诉我们Ifyouneedanythingfromus,Ron,pleasejustletusknow.实际上有点事情Actuallythereissomething.你们谁能路过宠物商店帮我带点鱼食吗Couldoneofyoupleasestopbythepetstoreandpickupsomefishfoodforme?你什么时候养的
6、鱼啊Whendidyougetafish?公园与游憩公园与游憩第6季第15集第6季第15集好了青年委员会联合演唱会信息更新MadisonOkay,youthcommittee.Updateontheunityconcert.Madison.目前为止12个乐队同意加入Sofar,12bandshavesaidyes.而且我们邀请他们所有人为新镇歌♥比赛提交一首歌♥Andweaskedthemalltosubmitasongforthenewtownanthemcontest.我觉得我们应该预订Orin作为头条我觉得不川多想IthinkweshouldbookOrina
7、saheadliner.Ithinkitsano-brainer.嗯他跟着BillyJoel的音乐让自己的肩膀脱臼Um,hedislocateshisshouldertothemusicofBilly)oel.(Pawnee日报称之为“为什么要有人这么做”ThePawneeJournalcalledit,Whywouldanyonedothis?1别再建议Orin了StopsuggestingOrin.Craig艺术帐篷信息更新呢Craig,anyupdateonthearttents?14个本地艺术家登记前来展示作品14localartistshavesigneduptoshowtheirw
8、ork.本来应该是15个但有一个家伙Itwasgoingtobe15,butthenthisoneguy)acksonPollock作品类似涂鸦的抽象艺术家自我描述为类JacksonPollock的describedhimselfasJacksonPollock-esque我告诉他那就是成人手指画我很讨厌andItoldhimthatsfingerpaintingforadultsandIhateit!Pawnee-Eagleton合并是艰难的一年ThePawnee-Eagletonmergerhasmadeforaroughyear,不管对于我还是对于这个镇bothformeandforth
9、etown.但如果我能搞定这个联介演唱会ButifIcanpulloffthisunityconcert证明合并是场成功andprovethatthismergerwasasuccess,Pawnee可能会再次忍♥受/无视我了Pawneemightonceagaintolerate/ignoreme.我知道听起来很糟糕但对于政♥治♥家来说Iknowthatsoundsbad,butforapolitician这基本上是最佳情况了it,sprettymuchthebest-casescenario.嗯你们最好变成一团印泥Well,youguysmight
10、aswellbeapileofleaves因为你们马上就会印象深刻的becauseyoureabouttogetblownaway.我约了一个会议就是和那位GrantLarsonIhavebookedameetingwithnoneotherthanGrantLarson.没人知道那是谁吗-呃我知道啊Nooneknowswhothatis?-Um,Ido.GrantLarson又名EltonJohnGrantLarson/otherwiseknownasEItonJohn.祝贺你啊Leslie-不GrantLarson是国家公园部中西分部的主任Congratulations,Leslie.-N
11、o,GrantLarsonisthedirectoroftheMidwestbranchoftheNationalParkService.他基本上就是中西部的LiamBonneville了He,sbasicallytheLiamBonnevilleoftheMidwest.1.iamBonneville1.iamBonneville?内政部常驻的坏孩子Thedepartmentoftheinteriorsresidentbadboy?他基本上是TimDWeCk-好吧无所谓了HesbasicallytheTimDweck-Okay,nevermind.我请求Grant宣布Eagleton山成为国
12、家公园1haveaskedGranttodeclareEagletonHillsanationalpark作为联合演唱会的终场节目asthegrandfinaleofourunityconcert.很好的主意LeslieGreatidea,Leslie.而这条更新表示Andwiththatupdate,Pawnee新创立者日联合演唱会现在正式thePawneenewfoundersdayunityconcertisnowofficially.提前完成提前完成百年快乐Leslie提前完成aheadofschedule!而这条横幅的展开标志着第100次Andthatbannerunfurlingm
13、arksthe100thtime我的项目得到thatoneofmyprojectshasbeen.提前完成aheadofschedule.联合演唱会赞助这是你们的机会能把你们的名字Thisisyourchancetoputyournames放上Pawnee联合演唱会2014年最大型的事件.onthePawneeunityconcert,thebiggesteventof2014.除了Tricia新挑染的头发besidestheunveilingofTricia,snewhighlights.你觉得我注意不到吗你看起来美飞了妹子YouthinkIwouldntnotice?Youlookflya
14、shell,girl!这场联合演唱会需要公♥司♥赞助Thisunityconcertneedscorporatesponsorship,所以Ben和我在和本地权贵们见面soBenandIaremeetingwithlocalbigwigs.我要做我最擅长的事情锁定交易mgonnadowhatIdobest-lockdowndeals.而这位呆呆龙要搞定那些无聊的东西Anddork-asaurusoverhereisgonnahandletheboringstuff.你说过你真心看重我商业敏锐性的价值啊Yousaidyougenuinelyvaluedmybusine
15、ssacumen.还有我是你老板Also,Tmyourboss.哦天啊他也太可爱了Oh,myGod,hessocute.你是我见过最可爱的宝宝熊Yourethecutestlittleboo-bearveeverseen.你是世界上最可.爱的宝宝我爱你YouaretheworldsmostadorablebabyandIloveyou!你也太宝贝了Youaresofreakingprecious!看看Gayle为宝宝做了什么1.ookwhatGayIemadeforthebaby.上面写着Pawnee政♥府♥财产ItsaysPropertyofPawneegover
16、nment可爱吧Isntthatadorable?我们走JohnComeon,John.哎呀Jeez.我们来了Hereweare.Pawnee和Eagleton边界的公园theparkthatbordersPawneeandEagleton.这是宣布我们联合演唱会的新闻发布会的完美地点Thisistheperfectplaceforthepressconferencetoannounceourunityconcert.人们会鼓掌会喝彩Peoplearegonnaclap,theyregonnacheer.今天可能就是我终于能人群冲浪的一天了TodaymightbethedaythatIfina
17、llycrowdsurf.我可能应该清空口袋以防万一Ishouldprobablyemptymypocketsjustincase.嘿一个问题Hey,onequestion.嗯你觉得你该站在哪里呢Um,wheredoyouthinkyouregonnastand,在那个写着PaWnee你好烂”的涂鸦前面infrontofthegraffitithatsaysPawnee,yousuck,还是“滚【可家吧Eagleton势利鬼们”orGohome,Eagletonsnobs?我一周前在涂鸦上涂过漆了啊这些人是最烂的Ipaintedoverthatgraffitiaweekago.Thesepeo
18、plearetheworst!我宣布联合演唱会的时候Icannotannounceaunityconcert不能站在一只秃头鹰竖中指的图画前面啊infrontofapictureofabaldeaglegivingthemiddlefinger.是啊你可能想站在旁边让人们都看到Yeah,youprobablywannastandtothesidesopeoplecanseeit.你知道我们为什么还要这堵墙啊Youknow,whydoweevenhavethiswall?我们应该是联合这两个镇的而这真的在分♥裂&hearts花们Weresupposedtobeunitingthet
19、wotowns,andthisliterallydividesthem.我们应该把它拆掉-这就来老板Weshouldjustknockitdown.-Onit,boss.啊Ahh!嗷0w.Kool-Aid广♥告♥那家伙让它看起来好简单啊Thekool-aidguymakesitlooksoeasy.在我在此工作的时期我忍♥受着一切Inthetimeveworkedhere,vetakengreatpains只让我在这栋楼里看到的部分越少越好toseeaslittleofthisbuildingaspossible.结果发现三楼安静而空旷Turnsout
20、thethirdfloorissilent,empty,完全摆脱了政♥府♥工作andcompletelyfreeOfgovernmentwork.我想不到能和我儿子分享的更美的东西了Icantthinkofanythingmorebeautifultosharewithmyson.如果我有个工具箱就能搞定那个有缺陷的暖气片了IflhadatoolboxIcouldtakecareofthatfaultyradiator.哦这个地方是天堂啊Ooh!Thisplaceisaparadise!干得好啊Tom我们有15家赞助提议了Nicelydone,Tom.Wehave1
21、5sponsorshipoffers.16家MitchSavnerMakethat16.MitchSavner.SaVner漂白剂和化学品是的SavnerBleachesandChemicals!-Thatsit.你们生产我最爱的美白牙贴-Youguysmakemyfavoriteteeth-whiteningstrips小女孩的小珍珠男女通川pearliesforgirlies.Itsunisex.商标上的卡♥通♥公上这么说的Thecartoonprincessonthelabelsaysso.我会赞助你们的演唱会llsponsoryourconcert.但我也想
22、投资其他事业Butmalsolookingtoinvestinotherventures.我有种感觉像你这样聪明的人应该有点自己的主意1haveafeelingabrightguylikeyouhassomeideasofhisown.我个人主意巢里可能有几个蛋准备能孵了Imayhaveafeweggsreadytohatchinthepersonalideanest.要不明天早上来我办公室向我推销你最热门的主意呢Whydontyoucometomyofficetomorrowandpitchmeyourhottestidea?完美我们到时候见Perfect!Illseeyouthen.哦那挺
23、酷的已经发生了BenOh,thatsprettycool.-Itsallhappening,Ben.很快我就有新的事业新的小房♥新的朋友Soonllhaveanewcareer,newcrib,newfriends.如果进展顺利这可能会是我最后需要和你对话的几次之一了Ifallgoeswell,thismaybeoneofthelasttimesIeverhavetospeaktoyou.跟我来我需要你的帮助Comewithme,Ineedyourhelp.非常感谢各位的前来Thankyousomuch,everyone,forcoming.而特别感谢市议会的支持Andaspec
24、ialthankyoutothecitycouncilfortheirsupport.我是听说这里会有免费烧烤自助Iwastoldtheredbeafreebarbecuebuffet?就拿点牛肉干然后.闭嘴吧Justtakesomebeefjerkyand.hush!今年春天我们会举办一场巨型的联合演唱会Thisspringwewillbeholdingamassiveunityconcert纪念Pawnee和Eagleton的合并tocommemoratethemergerbetweenPawneeandEagleton.这场三天的音乐艺术节会以我们称作的“新创立者日”结束Thisthre
25、e-daymusicandartsfestivalwillendonadaywewillcallNewFoundersDay/1我们镇官方的新开始anofficialbeginningtoournewtown.几年前Eagleton沿着边界立起了这堵墙Afewyearsago,Eagletonputupthiswallalongtheborder.现在到了拆掉这堵墙的时候了Nowitistimetoteardownthiswall.以联合的名义我把第一锤交给几位前Eagleton居民Inthenameofunity,IhavegivensomeformerEagletoniansthefirs
26、tstrike.来吧伙计们Takeitaway,guys.这是很好的一-Thisissuchagreatdayfor-蜜蜂蜜蜂哦Bees!Bees!Oh!所有人别慌Nobodypanic!哦不Ohhh,noooo!啊它蛰到我眼球了Ah!Itstungmeintheeyeball!哦天啊这也太棒了天Oh,man,thisisamazing,man.愚蠢的Eagleton人们完全被这些蜜蜂给碾压了ThestupidEagletoniansaretotallygettingthepwnedbythesebees.我要把这个直接发上ToshmgonnasendthisstraighttoTosh.嗷操
27、操0w,fuck!Fuck!别担心宝我会保护你的Dontworry,babe,llprotectyou.我被蛰过一次我免疫了Igotstungonce,mimmune.来蛰我啊蜜蜂们没用的Goaheadandstingme,bees.Itdoesnothing.1.eSlie看起来被蛰的大部分是来自Eagleton的人1.eslie,itappearsthatmostofthepeoplethatwerestungwerefromEagleton.你是怎么搞定的我什么也没搞Howdidyoupullthatoff?-1didntpullanythingoff.Eagleton人只是离墙最近而已
28、TheEagletoniansweresimplyclosesttothewall.此外有一个Pawnee居民被蛰在嘴上了Plus,onePawneeanwasstung.inhismouth因为他在笑话Eagleton人becausehewaslaughingattheEagletonians.你是怎么把你的蜜蜂塞进墙里的Howdidyougetyourbeesintothewall,这个好笑的针对Eagleton的蜜蜂恶作剧花了多久策划andhowlongdidittaketoplanthishilariousbeeprankonEagleton?它们不是我的蜜蜂TroddTheywere
29、notmybees,Trodd.而且最后说一次这不是恶作剧Andforthelasttimethiswasnotaprank.我不知道那堵墙里有蜜蜂Ididnotknowthatbeeswereinthatwall.我是说实际上你们应该把这当做是一个公共服务声明Imean,infactyoushouldtreatthislikeapublicserviceannouncement.所有人.都应该检查墙里有没有蜜蜂Everybody.shouldchecktheirwallsforbees.少来了恶作剧女王可能里面有蜜蜂呢Nicetry,prankqueen.Probablybeesinther
30、e.好吧到此为止了Okay,that,sallthetimeIhave.你还能用蜜蜂做什么-Leslie你的下一个恶作剧是什么Whatelsecanyoudowithyourbees?-Leslie,whatsyournextprank?哦Ooh.1.eslie国家公园部的GrantLarson来电1.eslie,GrantLarsonisonthephonefromtheNationalParkService.我现在不能见他我们在危机模式好吧Icannotmeetwithhimrightnow.Weareincrisismode,okay?1.alTy就跟他说我需要改期1.arry,just
31、tellhimIneedtoreschedule因为我在试着解决我的蜜♥穴&hearts问题becauseIamtryingtofixmybeeholedisaster.没问题等等不等等Okeydokey.-Wait!No,wait!不LalTy别那么跟他说No!Larry,donttellhimthat.别提到我的蜜♥穴♥Dontmentionmybeehole.正如我们所料JOhnJustaswesuspected,John.我们修好了阀门柄的密封性Werepairedthevalvestemseal,现在只剩卜.拧紧这个密封螺母了andnowal
32、lthatremainsistotightendownthispackingnut.然后这样就行了And.thatshoulddoit.我们能帮你吗Canwehelpyou?不一切都在我们掌控之中No.Wehaveeverythingundercontrol.我的队伍在重做这整层楼Mycrewsredoingthiswholefloor.我们现在是唯一允许上来的人Weretheonlypeoplealloweduphererightnow.嗯继续你们的工作你们不会注意到我们的Well,proceedwithyourwork.Youwontnoticeusatall.我们会有点吵的Weregon
33、nabekindaloud.我儿子已经几周大了Mysonisseveralweeksold.他已经很熟悉动力工具的声音了Hesquitefamiliarwiththesoundofpowertools.好吧那这个呢一指甲激光手术Okay,howaboutthisone-Lasikforfingernails?切一次指甲永远不用再切了Cutyourfingernailsonce,neverhavetocutemagain.我们只需要一个复杂的激光我毫不知道怎么做AllweneedisacomplicatedlaserIhavenoideahowtobuild.看起来不可能-好吧Seemsimpo
34、ssible.-Allright.啊哦“青盐饼干”给青年的盐饼干Uh-oh!Saltweens!1Saltinesfortweens.看起来.没必要Seems.unnecessary?我唯一接近完成的生意主意是一家餐厅TheonlybusinessideaIhavethatsevenremotelyfleshedoutisarestaurant.没门的餐厅在会计杂&hearts洁♥的“最高风险生意刊中是排名首位的Noway.RestaurantswererankednumberoneinAccountingMagazinesRiskiestBusinessesissue.实际上那
35、也是他们倒闭之前的最后♥期♥Thatwastheirlastissuebeforetheyfolded,actually.杂♥志♥的风险也很高Magazinesarealsoveryrisky.不敢相信一个天使投资人从天而降Icantbelieveanangelinvestorfloateddownfromtheheavens,而我甚至没有任何东西可以推销给他andIdontevenhaveanythingtopitchhim.拜托你至少应该有一个好的生意点子吧你已经52岁了啊Comeon,youmustvehadonegoodbusin
36、essidea.Youre52yearsold!不我没有但我确实有个主意No,mnot.ButIdohaveanidea.它毫无漏洞Itsair-tight.但我必须警告你它并不是超级性感ButIhavetowarnyou,itsnotsupersexy.是什么呢-好吧听好Whatisit?-Okay,listenup.你可以做中间人连接干洗店Youwouldbethemiddlemanbetweendrycleaners和销♥售♥化学品andthecompaniesthatsellchemicals.给干洗店的公♥司♥todryclea
37、ners.哇对吧Wow!-Right?你说的没错哥们那确实不性感Youreright,man.Thatisnotsexy.1.eslieKnope的小花招把三个人送进了医院1.eslieKnope,slittlestuntputthreepeopleinthehospital.这次蜜蜂事件只是这场合并Pawnee一方的最新攻击ThisbeeincidentisjustthelatestassaultcomingfromthePawneesideofthismerger.MikePatterson是Eagleton最顽固的记者MikePattersonisEagletonsmosttenacio
38、usreporter.他潜心挖掘一件事的时候他就会紧咬不放Whenhesinkshisteethintosomething,he,slikeadogwithabone!哦天啊你可不能侧身耳语然后大吼啊Oh,myGod!Youcantleanintowhisperandthenyell.那不公平-这次合并太脆弱了Thatsnotfair.-Thismergerissofragile,所有人都很紧张没人在讨论联合演唱会了everyoneisonedge,andnooneistalkingabouttheunityconcert.为什么有任何人会觉得那是个恶作剧啊Whywouldanybodythi
39、nkthatwasaprank?太悲哀了人们说什么都会相信Sosad.Peoplewillbelieveanything.但确实是恶作剧对吧-别出镜了好吧Itwasaprankthough,right?-Nomorepress,okay?你只需要低调一阵子Youjusthavetolaylowforawhile.我保证这都会平息的Ipromiseitllallblowover.APriI你的能力和清醒特别打动我我会听从你的意见April,yourcompetenceandyourlevelheadednessisverymovingtome,andIwillfollowyouradvice在我
40、去医院和每一位受害者当面道歉之后rightafterIgotothehospitalandapologizetoeveryvictiminperson.行但别带摄影-行啊我不会带的Fine,butnocameras.-Fine,Iwontbringany.啊我应付不了这些争吵了Aghh!Icanthandleallthisfighting.就像又回到了2004年的感恩节ItslikeThanksgiving2004alloveragain!问都别问Dontevenask!谁来跟着我我心烦意乱的Somebodyfollowme,mdistraught!谁是大孩子啊Whosabigguy?天忘了工
41、作吧Man,forgetaboutworking.我只想整天盯着这个小宝宝Ijustwannastareatthisbabyallday.你们在这层楼上的工作性质是什么Whatisthenatureofyourworkonthisfloor?整体重装-新地板固定装置管线Totalredo-newfloors,fixtures,plumbing.要花多久Howlongwillittake?6至J8周Sixtoeightweeks.成交Deal.我会在分配时间内完成这些工作Iwilldoallthisworkforyouinthetimeallotted.把你们的工具和材料拿上来就行Justhav
42、eyourtoolsandmaterialsbroughtuphere.你疯了吗这可是够-整个队伍干的活Areyoucrazy?Thisisenoughworkforawholecrew.我很肯定政♥府♥会相信你们这种说法msurethegovernmentbelievedyouwhenyoutoldthemthat,而我向你们获利他们无知的行为致敬andItipmycaptoyouforprofitingofftheirignorance.但我在向你们提供两个月的带薪假期Butmofferingyoutwomonthspaidvacation还有把我的完美工作归功
43、于你们自己的能力andtheabilitytotakecreditformywork,whichwillbeflawless.好吧伙计们我们走Okay.Guys,letsgo!我这里的帮助已经足够了IgotallhelpIllneedrighthere.好了这就是真心精彩的部分Okay,thisisthereallyexcitingpart.我们以每加仑$1.60的价格购买♥♥四氯乙烯Webuytetrachloroethyleneat$1.60agallon,但我们以每加仑2.38的价格卖♥♥回去butwesellitbackat2.3
44、8agallon.现在我知道你是怎么想的NowIknowwhatyourethinking.如果是一家需要买♥♥乙二醉酷的干洗店呢Whatifitsacleanerwhowantstobuyglycolethers?Ben够fBen,stop!这也太无聊了Thisissoboring!这就像是听着米黄色讲了一场TED演讲ThisislikelisteningtoaTEDtalkbythecolorbeige.你看我知道这个主意不会让你激动1.ook,Iknowthisideadoesn,texciteyou.但我保证能让你赚很多钱ButIpromiseitllmak
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